


An Origin Story

by joshuaorrizonte



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 15:16:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 35,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20428067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joshuaorrizonte/pseuds/joshuaorrizonte
Summary: When Thomas comes to Vesuvia as a child with his aunt, she opens up a magic shop. That magic shop is a favorite location of a particular street urchin who is skilled in magic and fortune telling. But when Asra's cards tell him that Thomas is his soulmate, he tries to disappear- only to be drawn inexorably back to the young magician. An apprentice's origin story.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't actually going to post this because it's so OC-centric, but I figured someone out there might enjoy it anyway, so here it is.

“Well, this is the place.”

Saskia set her bag down on the floor, looking around. Thomas stood at her elbow, looking small and still frightened. He was small for his age, something that she was certain he’d grow out of, with the right nurturing. 

Living with his mother had made him meek, and she hoped that damage could be undone, as well. Her heart had broken steadily with her brother’s death, Thomas’s father. It was an accident. The fire had been magical in origin- a fire that he himself had set. It was intended to be a controlled burn. No one had figured out why he lost control of it, but it had ultimately taken his life. 

Terrified now of losing her beloved son, Thomas’s mother- bereft of magic- forbade Thomas from ever using it again. It wasn’t that simple for him; he was powerful, like all magicians in his father’s family, and needed the instruction to control it. Saskia offered to tutor him, but couldn’t promise that he’d never use magic in the course of those lessons. 

So she refused. And the more his mother punished him for accidentally using his magic, the more the involuntary use happened, and the worse the punishments got. Saskia drew the line when his mother struck him for it. She wouldn’t sit back and watch her beloved nephew be abused for being who he was. She hadn’t kidnapped the boy; she’d sat his mother down for a nice, long, heart-to-heart. Her intention had always been to gain custody of him, and she carefully guided the conversation to lead his mother to the conclusion that was what was best for him.

And then they left. Saskia hadn’t known where they were going or what they would do; she’d only known that they couldn’t stay there, where Thomas’s mother could still strangle his spirit. She always, always made sure he was as comfortable as she could make him; she’d missed a few meals, but he never did. And now it was over; they had a place they could call home.

Thomas edged closer to the stairs, leading to a small upper-level apartment they could live in. It would be cramped when Thomas hit adolescence, but that was a bridge they could cross when they came to it. For now, it would do. “Go on up and see our new home,” she urged. Her quiet nephew needed no further encouragement, bolting up the stairs, pack bouncing on his back.

Saskia watched him go, smiling to herself as she moved to stand behind the glass counter, running her hands over it, tracing sigils in the dust. After all their traveling...

... they were home.

* * *

“... and you can’t go to the Masquerade alone.”

“Aunt Saskia! I’m sixteen years old! I think I can handle a party at the castle!”

Thomas knew he wasn’t going to be allowed to go. But he wasn’t going to make it easy on her.

A mischievous look came over her face. “I’ll make a deal with you.”

His interest was immediately piqued. “Oh?”

She leaned over the counter, chin resting in her hand. “You know about the street rat that’s constantly setting up shop around back, don’t you?”

“The fortune teller?” He did indeed know him; they’d acknowledged each other’s presence before, but never spoken outside of nods to each other as they passed. “What about him?”

“If you can get rid of him, you can go to the Masquerade.”

Thomas frowned. “That’s not very nice.”

“Tommy, he’s poaching customers. I’ve let him stay because he’s young but he’s not that young anymore.”

“I’ll do my best,” he said with a sigh. With that, he went out into the street, going over in his head what he’d say. Honesty was probably his best bet in this case.

As he approached the youth, their eyes locked, and Thomas felt a pang in his chest, strange and foreign and confusing. This youth’s violet eyes were the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen in his life.

He kept his expression carefully neutral as he approached. “You’re this shop’s fortune teller,” the young man said. Even his voice was breathtakingly beautiful.

“I am,” Thomas agreed. 

The violet-eyed youth tilted his head to the side. Thomas found the gesture adorable. “What can I do for-“

He was cut off as a trumpet sounded, blaring in the afternoon air. Thomas turned and fell back against the little table the youth was using. The crowd pressed in on them, and a carriage rolled past. A woman with long, flowing hair the color of twilight and bright red eyes peered out of the carriage’s window. “Princess Nadia Satrinava,” the youth murmured. Then he sighed. “I hope she’s able to establish that treaty. Vesuvia could use the help. Count Lucio...” His voice trailed off as Thomas turned back to him. “Well. As I was saying... what can I do for you?”

“Wait,” Thomas replied. “I want to hear what you have to say about Count Lucio. I wouldn’t think someone like you would have an opinion on such things.”

“Someone like me, huh?” The stranger’s voice was carefully flat. Thomas was about apologize when the youth shook his head. “Count Lucio has done very little for the city,” he said finally. “The only reason people put up with him is because he throws good parties.” Then his face colored a little. “No offense if you like him, of course.”

Thomas could hear in his voice that he fully meant offense if Thomas liked Lucio. He shook his head slowly. “To be honest, I’ve never paid close enough attention to have an opinion one way or another.”

“You should.” His voice is neutral, void of outward judgement. “This is your home, after all. And he’s in charge of keeping it safe and pleasant to be in.”

Thomas nodded, thinking about what the youth was saying. After a moment, the violet-eyed youth said with a smile, “But I’m sure you didn’t come out here to talk politics with me. What can I do for you?”

There it was. Thomas got the feeling the man already knew why he was out there. “Well, honesty is the best policy,” he said nervously. “Let me say first that I don’t care if you’re here or not, but Aunt Saskia says you’re poaching my customers.”

“Ah.” The youth’s face colored slightly.

But that was all he was going to say. Thomas took a deep breath. “And she says I can’t go to the Masquerade unless I get you to go away.”

A little puff of laughter escaped the stranger. “So that’s why she sent you instead of coming out herself.”

“Wait, you knew?”

“I guessed. I figured I’d overstayed my welcome when you came over to talk to me.” He gave him a charming, albeit wistful smile. “Although I would like to make up the lost customers to you somehow. How about a reading? On the house.”

The youth leaned forward eagerly. Thomas was intrigued. He’d never had a reading done before; he was always the one doing the reading. “Sure, why not? My name is Thomas. For the reading.”

“Asra.” The youth extended a hand, and Thomas took it. Asra’s palm was rough, but warm, almost soothing.

He blushed and pulled away. Asra gave him a reassuring smile, and shuffled his deck. Thomas watched his hands as he expertly shuffled, the cards almost fluid in his hands. When he was done, he pulled the top three cards from the deck and laid them out in front of Thomas.

Thomas's fingers hovered over the cards until he felt a tingling in his fingers as it reached the card. He pointed at that one, and Asra flipped it over. "The Lovers," Asra murmured. 

Asra focused on the card, as if listening intently to it. "Well?" Thomas asked eagerly. "What does it have to say?"

Asra stared hard at it, his eyes going wide. Then, as if remembering himself, his expression shifted to bland neutrality again. "It says that a relationship is coming. One that will make you happy, with your soulmate."

"Oh, neat." Thomas looked up at Asra in time to notice the other youth looking at him with an odd expression. "Is that all?"

"I- no. It says you've- you've already met them."

Thomas blinked. "I don't know how that could be. I barely leave the shop. I only talk to Aunt Saskia and customers."

"Maybe it was one of those customers." Asra gathered up his cards again. "Maybe they'll be back. Keep your eyes peeled and your heart open. And now-" he gave him a mischievous grin- "I better get going. Wouldn't want you to miss the Masquerade on my account."

"I can't believe it was as easy as just asking you," Thomas chuckled. "Aunt Saskia would've saved herself a lot of aggravation if she'd just come out and talked to you."

"Well, you know adults. Always making things harder for themselves. See you around, Thomas."

"See you." Thomas went back to the stoop and turned to watch as Asra grabbed his bag, folded up his little table and picked it up, and wandered away. He felt terrible about that. He needed the customers more than they did, and he had the strangest feeling, as he watched him walk away, that sending him away had been a terrible, grave mistake. Sighing, Thomas went back into the shop. "He's gone," he announced.

Saskia blinked, looking up at him. "That was awfully easy. I wonder what he's planning on doing."

"Worried about him?"

"Not particularly. I've seen him around as long as we've been here. I've bought readings from him when it seemed like he was desperate. I've never really seen him in trouble, though. Regardless, I don't want him hanging around here."

"Because of having to share customers?"

"That's most of it." She sighed. "The other part of it is that the street rats are thieves. I don't blame them; it's necessary for their survival. But I still don't want to be stolen from."

There was something profoundly wrong with that statement, but Thomas didn't know enough about the subject to contradict her. Instead, he said uncomfortably, "Well, he's gone now. You said I could go to the Masquerade if I got rid of him."

"I sure did." She smiled and sighed, standing up straight. "Here, I have something for you." Curious, Thomas went around behind the counter as Saskia pulled a decorated mask from beneath it and handed it to him. He took it with a gasp, and she smiled. "I actually had our resident street rat make that for you."

He took it, hands running over the delicate brushwork. "It's gorgeous. I-" Then he looked up at her, eyes narrowed. "And you had me chase him off?"

"I asked him to leave then, once I paid him. He did... for a day." She sighed. "I fully expect him to be back out there tomorrow, but for now..." She smiled, taking the mask from him and fixing it over his face. "He is talented, I'll give him that much," she murmured, then took the mask off of him and handed it back to him. "I don't have a costume for you, though. There was no way for me to hide an entire outfit from you, but the mask will do. I want you to promise me- no drinking. Do you hear me? You're entirely too young to be doing that."

"The age for drinking is-"

"I know what it is and I know you're over it. But in Sesarach, the drinking age is twenty, and we are Searachian. I expect you to stay sober tonight. If you come home drunk, you will never go to another Masquerade. Am I understood?"

Thomas sighed. "Yes, Aunt Saskia."

"Good boy." She leaned up and kissed him on the forehead. "Help me clean up the shop and you can go to the palace for the party, alright?"

He nodded, and picked up the broom from its place by the cabinets. As he started sweeping, his mind kept going back to Asra. He didn't seem like a thief to him; he seemed like an honest kid, doing his best to survive. He wondered if Asra had someplace to go at night. He was very thin, but he didn't look like he was starving. He hoped he'd be alright.

And that reading... How was it possible that Thomas had already met his soulmate? As he told Asra, he never actually talked to anybody but customers. That was the first conversation that wasn't about business that Thomas had had in weeks, maybe months. And then there was the way Asra reacted to it, very subtle, but he was definitely put off by it for some reason.

Thomas stopped mid-sweep, eyes widening. Could he have been- 

And with that, he resumed sweeping in earnest. Of course not. The very thought was absurd. If that was the case, Asra would've told him- and probably laughed it off, but he couldn't imagine being told that he was someone's soulmate by the cards and  _ not _ making some kind of move, especially with how confident Asra was. And with good reason- there was a reason, other than price, that he was able to poach customers from Thomas so easily. Thomas didn't need to know the boy to know he was talented. 

But, he thought with a sly, private grin, he wouldn't have  _ minded _ finding out that Asra was his soulmate. He was handsome enough, after all.

He shook his head, as if to shake the thoughts from it. He knew nothing about Asra but the fact that he was handsome, around his age, and talented with fortune telling. He had no idea if being Asra's soulmate was a good thing or not, and it was a moot point, anyway: Asra had walked away. He obviously wasn't them. Although, if Saskia was right... He'd be able to ask Asra for a more detailed reading tomorrow, when Asra popped back up. For now, he had a party to get ready for, a party he wanted desperately to go to. He'd never been to the Masquerade before. Aunt Saskia always told him he was too young, and she never wanted to go, either. Said it wasn't a good place to take a child.

Well, he wasn't a child, and he could take care of himself, and he would prove that to her tonight by going there, having good, sober fun, and then being home before morning. 

* * *

Thomas slept in the next day, exhausted by his partying, but deeply contented. It had been tons of fun, and he'd even talked to some really interesting people- including the Count himself. 

Throughout the conversation, he'd kept Asra's admonition in mind, listening closely to what Count Lucio said, not just out of respect, but out of curiosity. He decided within the first few seconds of the conversation that he didn't like the man at all. He was pompous, full of himself- but he struck Thomas as intensely lonely, too. He sympathized with that; Thomas was lonely a lot, too. But that didn't make up for the casual, off-the-cuff insults about his age and demeanor that had Thomas gritting his teeth behind his mask and hoping against hope that the Count would lose interest in him quickly and leave him be.

He also caught a glimpse of Princess Nadia, although he didn't have an opportunity to talk to her. The guards and her entourage only let through a select few townspeople and nobles. But she had caught his eye from a distance and smiled at him, filling him with warmth before she was engaged in another conversation with another noble. At that point, Thomas made his way out of the ballroom to explore some of the themed rooms, see what he could see. 

When he awoke the next day, he went outside and looked around. A sharp lance of disappointment went through him as he saw that Asra was nowhere to be seen. With a sigh, he went back inside. "Our friend didn't come back?" he asked Saskia.

She shook her head. "No, he didn't. Maybe he went to the Masquerade and was out late. You didn't get home until the small hours in the morning, after all, and I know people party until the sun comes up at these things."

"I didn't see him."

"Of course you didn't. There were hundreds of people there, and you weren't looking for him. Were you?"

There was something suspicious in Saskia's tone. He considered challenging her on it, but thought better of it. "No, I wasn't. Still... Before he left yesterday, he gave me a reading to make up for my lost business. I wanted to ask him a question about it."

"Mm. What was the reading?"

Thomas eyed her in discomfort. "You're gonna be mad."

"I might be mad at  _ him _ , but not  _ you _ , sweetheart. He's the one giving unsolicited readings. What did he say?"

He took a deep breath. "He said that I was going to be in a relationship soon, with my soulmate." An indulgent smile crossed her features, and he finished his thought. "And that I'd already met them."

The indulgent expression dropped from her face, replaced by suspicion. Her eyes narrowed and she said, "Oh, did he? Did he happen to say who this soulmate was?" Thomas shook his head, and she sighed. "You do know better than to take him at his word, right? He's got every reason in the world to try to con you into a relationship with him."

Thomas's face flushed. "We don't even know if that was what he was trying to do. He said nothing about himself, and when I pointed out that I only ever talk to customers, he suggested that it was one of them. Honestly, Aunt Saskia, him being on the street doesn't make him inherently untrustworthy. I'm surprised you think that."

"I don't think that about them  _ all _ . Just him. There's something about him specifically that I don't trust. I've learned to listen to my intuition, and I think you should, too. I can't stop you from asking your question when he comes back around, but make sure you listen to his answer with discernment. I don't want you putting yourself in a position that he can hurt you in."

Thomas resisted the urge to scoff, and stopped himself. He knew nothing about Asra. For all he knew, Saskia’s intuition about him was correct. “I’ll be careful,” Thomas said, “Besides, I barely know him. It’s not like I’m going to be jumping into bed with him or anything like that.”

“I don’t want you jumping into bed with anybody,” she replied, biting her lip and looking very concerned. “Keep in mind also that even if I didn’t have this bad feeling about him, he’s too old for you.”

He tilted his head at that. “Really? He looks about my age. How old is he?”

“I don’t know but I know he’s older than you. Tommy, I can’t overstate this. Please, please be careful. I’d prefer it if you didn’t talk to him again, but as long as you keep it professional, I can live with that.”

“Fine. I’m only interested in the reading, nothing else.”

“Good. Come over here, I need help with these traveler’s charms. You’re better at threading the sparkweed through them than I am.”


	2. Chapter 2

Asra wasn’t there the next day, either, or the day after that. Disappointment turned to frustration, and then even that eased as the days passed. But not a day went by that Thomas didn’t think about Asra, hoping he was well and happy. 

With his successful excursion to the Masquerade the previous year, it was just accepted by both Thomas and his aunt that he would get to go this year, as well. Saskia taught him how to sew, and he worked on a costume for months- but the mask he had used the previous year would clash horribly with it. He needed a new one.

The day before the Masquerade, Thomas set out for the marketplace. The place would be filled to the brim with people hawking masks, costumes, and trinkets for the party. He was sure he’d be able to find a mask that would match his outfit.

His eyes scanned the busy marketplace, gliding over the stalls and stands until one caught his eye, and his breath caught in his throat. There, in a makeshift stall by a baker, was Asra.

A flood of feelings assaulted Thomas, from relief to happiness to a strange, unaccountable longing. Asra hadn’t seen him yet; he considered walking away, finding another vendor. But Asra’s mask had been utterly beautiful last year- and buying from him again was the least that Thomas could do, after he’d chased him from a spot that had clearly been working for him.

He approached, pushing his way through the crowd, until he was within earshot of Asra. “We meet again,” he said, lifting a hand in greeting. 

Asra’s eyes widened and lit up in recognition. He looked thrilled, but his voice was calm as he said, “Thomas! It’s good to see you’re well. Looking forward to another Masquerade?”

Thomas nodded. “And I don’t have to do my aunt’s dirty work to be allowed to go this time,” he said with a wry grin. “It’s good to see you. I’ve wondered where you’ve been. Aunt Saskia expected you to be outside the shop the next day, and then you never came back.”

Asra’s face colored and he looked away. “Yes, well- I figured it was time to move on, if she was siccing her nephew on me now.”

“Have you been well?”

“Well enough. You?”

“I’m doing good,” he answered. “Working with Aunt Saskia on my magic. I never thought I’d say this, but I miss school.”

“School? Where are you from?”

“Seserach.”

“Well, you’re a long way from home.”

Thomas scoffed, “Vesuvia has been home for the last nine years. There isn’t much I miss about Seserach.”

Asra gave him a small, amused smile. “I see. I assume you didn’t come all the way to the marketplace to reminisce about your childhood home. Is there something I can help you with?” Mischievous amusement flashed in his violet eyes.

“As a matter of fact, there is,” Thomas murmured, looking down at the table and examining the masks on it. “First- I need a mask. The one I had last year clashes horribly with the costume I made.”

“You made your own costume this year?” Asra’s eyes glittered with admiration. “Well, describe it for me. I’m sure I have something for you and if not, I’ll make something.”

The idea sent a tremor of guilt through Thomas. “Oh- no, I couldn’t ask that-“ 

“It would give me something to do while waiting for customers, but let’s see if I have anything first.”

Thomas described the costume, the colors and fabric and cut. As Asra listened, he picked up masks and set them in the center of the table, and when Thomas had finished, he picked up one final mask for inspection. “Mm, that sounds stunning. Wish I could see it.”

“Maybe you could.” Thomas ignored the way color flared in Asra’s face as he looked over his choices for the mask. They were all gorgeous, all would go dazzlingly with his costume. “The other thing is that reading. You remember it, right?”

“I do.” Asra’s voice was guarded, and when Thomas looked up, his violet eyes seemed shuttered. “What about it?”

“It... hasn’t happened yet. I was wondering if you wanted to get drinks after the party, and we could maybe... clarify it? I’d pay, of course. For the reading and the drinks.”

His expression grew even more guarded. There was a playful smile on his lips, though. “You don’t look old enough to drink.”

“Look who’s talking, babyface.”

Asra laughed. “Seriously, how old are you?”

Thomas had the uncomfortable feeling Asra was fishing for information, but that didn’t stop him from answering. “Seventeen. You?”

“Nineteen. I guess we’re both old enough for those drinks.” He chuckled, scratching the back of his head. “I can try to clarify the reading, but it’s been so long- it’s possible it hasn’t happened yet because something’s changed- or he might be avoiding you, for some reason.”

“He?”

“Or her, or them. Do you have a preference for where to go?”

“I’m not familiar with anywhere but my own neighborhood, but... we shouldn’t go anywhere near there.”

“Oh? Why not?” 

Thomas had picked up one of the masks. “How much?”

Asra peered at it. “For you? Free.”

“Asra... I’m serious.”

“So am I. You’re already buying me drinks and a reading. Just take it. Why shouldn’t we go somewhere in your neighborhood.”

“Aunt Siskia doesn’t like you.”

“Well, I  _ was _ stealing business from you.”

“This is more than that. She doesn’t like  _ you. _ She...” Thomas felt his face flush, and he cut himself off.

“Now I’m curious. The only words we ever had was her ordering me off her property.” Asra leaned his elbows on the stall table, propping his chin in his hands. “You can’t go that far and stop. Tell me. I might be able to come to an understanding with her, at least.”

Thomas took a deep breath. “When I told her about the reading, she accused you of trying to con me into a relationship with you and said you were too old for me.”

Asra’s expression soured. “That was why I stopped coming around. I knew how it looked, telling you that you’d already met your soulmate.” He straightened. “But I haven’t even spoken to you since then. Surely she’s let go of that idea.”

Thomas shook his head. “I’d still rather not risk it. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry for looking out for me, or yourself.” But now Asra had a glint in his eye, an expression that said,  _ if I’m gonna do the time, I might as well commit the crime. _ He said none of that, however. “There’s a bar down in the south end, near where I grew up. It’s in a rough part of town, but I’m known there, and the bar is clean and relatively safe. It’s called the Rowdy Raven. Ever heard of it?” Thomas shook his head, and Asra shrugged. “That’s fine. Meet me back here a little after eleven. Sorry for making you leave the party early, but I live in the woods outside of town and my companion will worry if I’m not back by three, at the latest.”

“That’s fair enough,” Thomas said with a nod. “I’ll see you then. Thanks for the mask, Asra.”

Asra gave a smile and a nod, and Thomas turned and walked away. Companion, huh?...

All day, Thomas considered not going to the Masquerade, just sitting tight and going to meet Asra at the appointed time. After only a moment’s worth of thought, he discarded the idea. He’d have to sneak out, and that was something he didn’t want to do.

All night, though, all he could think of was Asra. Why would it have even occurred to him to consider that someone might think he was saying he was Thomas’s soulmate? Granted, that was what Thomas had assumed, but Thomas was a hopeless romantic.

The time to meet Asra finally arrived, and he made his way back to Asra’s spot in the marketplace. Asra was there, as promised, and his eyes lit up in the lantern light as Thomas approached. “That is a gorgeous costume,” he murmured. Then he smiled. “Did you have fun?”

“Yes, but I was thinking of you the entire time.”

An undefinable tightness spread across Asra’s jaw and reached his eyes. “Oh? I had the same problem, to tell the truth. I feel like we need to clear the air. ‘Soon’ is a nebulous concept, and it would be better for you if you had a clearer concept of when this is going to happen.” 

“I’m more interested in who it is than when it’ll happen.”

Asra gave him a sidelong glance. He thought it seemed a bit nervous. “I don’t think the cards can tell you who anymore than they can give you an exact timeframe. I’m going to ask clarification, but it might be best to not get your hopes up for exact answers.”

A thought occurred to Thomas. “I could read for you, too.”

A nervous laugh. “What good would that do you?”

Thomas shrugged. “Practice makes perfect. And to be honest, I’m not as confident in my skills as I’d like. And you seem awfully anxious about something.”

“Me? Anxious?” A laugh that sounded forced. “Tell you what. Let me clarify the reading and then if you’re feeling up to it, you can try to read for me. I assume you don’t have your deck.”

“No, I don’t. That’s a fair point.”

“And mine is unique to me.”

Thomas glanced at him. “Unique to you?”

“I created the deck myself.”

There was a hint of pride there, and Thomas smiled. “They should be able to read your fortune easily then. How much farther is it to this bar?

“Not very. We’re almost there.”

There was a lull in the conversation then, as Asra led him through the streets of the south end. This really was a bad part of town, and Thomas couldn’t say he wasn’t nervous. But Asra moved with such an air of confidence that Thomas felt safe in his presence.

They finally arrived at the bar, Asra greeting the barkeep the way he’d have greeted an old friend. He waved Thomas over to a corner booth and asked, “Do you want to tell me what you want, or do you trust me to get you something good?”

“I trust you,” Thomas replied solemnly. There was a hint of tension in the air before he continued, “Nothing with too much alcohol in it, though. Aunt Saskia is pretty adamant that I don’t drink.”

“I don’t even plan on getting you tipsy. I’ll be right back with our drinks.”

“Oh, wait. I need to give you-“

“Pay me back.” With that, Asra turned and went to the bar. Thomas looked around the room curiously, waiting for Asra to come back. It was noisy, but he got the feeling it was less busy than usual, on account of the Masquerade. Everyone was at the palace, enjoying the Count's party. Thomas didn't think he'd have liked it if he was here on a night where people didn't have anywhere else to be. It would be unbearably crowded.

Asra returned with two drinks; they looked identical. Thomas accepted his with a nod, and took a sip; it was floral and fruity, notes of roses, strawberries and peaches in the liquid. "This is really tasty," he said, and took another sip. 

"I thought you'd like that one." Asra took a sip of his own drink, and reached into his bag to retrieve his tarot deck. He spoke as he shuffled it. "I think it'd be best to give you an entirely new reading, rather than ask clarification on the one I gave you last year. Too much time has passed; for all we know, we'll be asking about a situation that's changed. It's better to get new information. I think I'm going to do a past, present, and future this time."

Thomas nodded. "And then when you're done, I'll give you one."

Asra smiled hesitantly, then drew the top three cards of his deck and flipped them over. "The Lovers, again." 

Asra frowned at it, staring at the card. "What are you doing?" Thomas asked.

Asra looked up, startled. "I- Well, this deck doesn't work like an ordinary deck. I... enchanted it to connect directly to the Arcana. They can give ordinary readings, but the Major Arcana... speak to me. Tell me what they need to tell me. Mostly. Sometimes they just talk in riddles."

Thomas was intrigued. "And what are the Lovers telling you now?"

"I... Well..." He grimaced. "They're insisting that you know your soulmate, and that... they're avoiding you."

"What? Why?"

"I'm not entirely sure." There was a shadow of guilt in Asra's eyes that gave Thomas pause. Asra was avoiding him. Could it...? "It could be any number of reasons. They could be afraid. They could just not be ready to talk to you yet. Let's see what the other cards have to say." With that, he turned over the second card. "Death. Something needs to change to move forward." He frowned, then shook his head, moving on to the third card. "And... The Fool." Asra focused hard on the card. "New beginnings..."

There was something in Asra's tone that Thomas wasn't sure he liked. "Are you alright?"

Asra blinked and looked up, a bland smile overtaking his features. "I'm fine. So here's what I've gotten from this reading: Your soulmate is still out there, but something needs to change before they'll come to you. They will, eventually, and you'll have a new beginning with them."

Thomas smiled. "That's a clarification of the reading last year."

Chuckling, Asra rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, the cards do what they want to. Did you still want to give me a reading?"

"Sure, why not? What kind of reading do you want?"

Asra gathered up the cards and handed them to Thomas. "Do a past, present, and future. A fair exchange. Ah, I should warn you, they might not speak to you the way they do for me."

Thomas eyed him suspiciously. So he had no way of confirming that these cards did what Asra claimed they did? Well, alright then. But an ordinary tarot deck was still a tarot deck, no matter what the owner said about them. Thomas shuffled the cards, focusing on Asra. He now very strongly suspected that Asra thought  _ he _ was Thomas's soulmate. He was the only person he knew who had been actively avoiding him. And if these cards were as powerful as Asra claimed they were... well. 

He quickly put that out of his mind. He didn't want to taint his reading for Asra with his own feelings. Once it felt as thought he'd shuffled them enough, he drew out three cards and laid them on the table. Asra was tense across from him, as if he wanted to tell Thomas that this was a bad idea, not to do it after all. Before Asra could do so, Thomas flipped the first card over. "The... the Tower." 

And then he felt it. A voice in the back of his mind- no, not a voice. A  _ feeling _ . "Something terrible happened to you," he murmured. "It- it was a sudden change. One day everything was fine and the next, it wasn't."

Asra met his gaze in wonder. "Are they speaking to you? The cards?"

"Not... exactly  _ speaking _ , per se, but they are telling me what they think we should know. Is this... is this what you meant when you said that the cards speak to you?" 

Asra nodded, looking down at the cards. "I don't understand," he murmured. "That shouldn't be possible..." Then he shook his head. "Keep going. You're entirely right about my past. I want to see what you come up with for my present and future."

Thomas nodded, and flipped over the second card. "The Nine of Swords. You're afraid of something, to the point of obsessing over it. You're losing sleep from it and you have been for a while, haven't you?"

Asra nodded, dumbfounded. "Is that card speaking to you?"

After a second, Thomas nodded. "It is. It's not as strong a pull as the Tower, but it's there."

"Interesting. What's the last card?"

The future. Thomas picked it up and flipped it over. "The... Three of Swords..."

Asra grimaced. "Well, this isn't a very cheerful reading. What's it saying to you?"

"You're going to lose something precious to you. There's a very small chance of averting this, but it'll most likely happen. There will be a way to get it back- but at a price you might not be willing to pay."

Asra sat back, exhaling shakily. "Well.  _ Well _ . That's not reassuring at all."

Thomas picked up the cards and handed them back to him. "You were actually looking for answers? This wasn't just for curiosity's sake?"

"Both? It was purely for curiosity's sake at first- I wanted to see how good you actually are- but once you said you could hear the cards..." His voice trailed off, looking distant, and Thomas caught a hint of fear in his violet eyes. Those beautiful, violet eyes... he didn't want to see them hurt. 

"I'm sure everything will work out in the end," he said softly.

"It always does." Asra managed another hesitant smile, looking back at him, meeting his gaze evenly. 

Thomas's mind wandered to Asra's reading for him. Every nerve in his body sang to him that he was looking at his soulmate, but why would Asra be avoiding it? He had no reason to fear Thomas. Maybe it was just because they barely knew each other? But then, wouldn't it make sense for him to  _ not _ avoid him? If they were soulmates- if they were destined to be together- wouldn't it behoove them both to get to know each other?

Without realizing it, Thomas had leaned forward across the table. Asra stayed still, watching him warily, anticipation in his eyes. Asra's lips parted slightly as Thomas leaned the rest of the way across the table and pressed his lips to Asra's. Asra held himself perfectly still, his eyes fluttering shut as he very gently kissed back. 

Thomas drew away after a few seconds to see Asra's face flushed bright red. He was certain his own face was just as red. "I, um..." he said, his voice just above a whisper. He wasn't sure what to say now.

"Thomas..." Asra's voice trailed off, just as at a loss for words as Thomas was. 

Thomas occupied the empty space in the conversation by sipping his drink. Asra clearly thought that was a good idea, and downed his drink before saying, "That was... nice. I'm not sure we should do it again, though."

"Why not?" The words were out of Thomas's mouth before he could stop them.

Asra gave him a soft, slightly amused smile. "Your aunt doesn't like me, remember?"

Thomas made an unhappy noise, and finished his drink. The alcohol made him brave and brazen. "I don't know why you're fighting it," he said, half-expecting Asra to play stupid.

"Yes, well... things aren't always as simple as we want them to be."

"You're not denying it."

"You've obviously figured it out." He frowned. "And it's not set in stone, either. Fate doesn't exist. We make our own destinies."

"Would being my soulmate really be that terrible?"

Asra shook his head, looking away. "You... you know nothing about me. And I don't know anything about you, either."

"So we can get to know each other."

Again, Asra shook his head. "It's getting late. I need to get home- and so do you. I'll walk you back to the shop."

Thomas's heart sank. Asra was right, they knew nothing about each other. But... "I want to get to know you," he insisted stubbornly. "You're- well- you're fascinating. And quite handsome."

His face colored again. "Well thank you. You're not too hard on the eyes, either." Thomas blushed, and Asra stood. "But we really should be getting us both home."

Thomas stood with him, and asked, "How much do I owe you for the drink and reading?"

"You paid for the reading with your own and your company was enough payment for the drink." Asra gave him a charming grin as they left the establishment.

Thomas tried to talk to him as they headed through the streets, but Asra was hesitant to respond. It was like there was a wall of ice around Asra that Thomas couldn't get through. He reiterated that he lived outside of the city, in the woods, although declined to say exactly where. Asra was on his own with his friend- "Just a friend?"

"Just a friend."- since he was a little boy. Thomas thought about asking Asra what happened to his parents or guardians, but that seemed like too personal a question.

Asra couldn't keep the curiosity from his voice, though, when he asked, "What about you? How did you come to live with your aunt, so far from home?"

Thomas sighed. "Well... my father was a magician. He was killed in a magic-related accident, and my mother forbade me from ever using it again. But you're a magician yourself, right?" Asra nodded, and Thomas continued, "So you know that it's not something that can just be turned off, especially when you're young and untrained. I don't remember much of the situation, but Aunt Saskia says that my mother started hitting me when I'd inadvertently use magic, and she saw it once and convinced Mom to let her take me to keep it from escalating."

"That's rough," Asra murmured, sympathy in his gaze. 

Thomas shrugged. "I'm happy here- happier than I'd have been being forced to lock away such a significant part of who I am."

"I'm glad you're happy." They had reached the shop. "Well, this is it. It was fun, dramatically bad tarot reading and all."

Thomas looked up into his eyes. "Can we see each other again?"

"Maybe. It depends."

"On what?"

"I'm... not exactly sure." He sighed. "We'll see what the future has in store for us. For now... rest well, Thomas." He bent and kissed him on the cheek, lingering there for just a few seconds longer than was entirely comfortable. "Thank you," he whispered.

"Thank  _ you _ ," Thomas murmured back. Asra gave him one last, longing look, before turning and disappearing back down the road. Thomas sighed and unlocked the shop door, and stepped inside.

Saskia was sitting there by the window, and Thomas froze as his gaze fell on her. "So," she said mildly, "who found who?"

"I found him."

"What was he doing?"

Thomas pulled the mask out of his pocket and showed her. "He was selling masks he made."

"I see. I didn't see him in a costume."

"He didn't go."

"Did you?"

He sighed. "Yes. We met up after I was done with the party."

"Why?"

Now he was starting to get irritated. "Just to hang out. I haven't seen him since last year."

Saskia stood up. "Why would you  _ need _ to hang out with him? He's a complete stranger!"

"He's not a  _ complete _ stranger, and I have no friends. It's  _ lonely _ , Aunt Saskia. It's lonely and he's willing to talk to me. I know you don't like him but  _ you _ don't know him, either."

"Listen to me, sweeting." She crossed the distance between them, putting her hands on either side of his face. He was tall enough that she was starting to have to reach to do this. "You're right, I don't know him. I know he spent years ignoring me when I told him he wasn't welcome, stealing business we  _ needed _ . I could've asked the guards to take care of him, but I never did- and the next thing I know, he's telling my precious nephew that he's his soulmate. Out of the blue. Just like that. What am I supposed to think?"

"That is not  _ at all _ what happened, Aunt Saskia." Thomas's voice was a deadpan. "In fact, he never came back because he was afraid that was the impression he'd given. Let me say it again in case you didn't hear me the first time:  _ he never came back _ . He’s got no ill intentions. I know you’re used to listening to your intuition but in this case it’s  _ wrong. _ ”

Saskia sighed. “Maybe you’re right. And I don’t want you to be lonely. I just have such a bad feeling about him. Something about him rubs me the wrong way. I wish you’d take that seriously.”

“Yeah, well, it might be a moot point.” He sighed. “I asked him if we could see each other again and his answer was a very hesitant ‘we’ll see.’ You scared him off.”

“I strongly doubt that. I was never unkind to him, and I didn’t even know you were with him until I saw you.”

“Fine. I told him you don’t like him and  _ that  _ scared him away.”

“Fair enough. It’s late; we should both be in bed.” Thomas nodded and moved to go around her, and she said his name very softly. He stopped at the first stair. “I’m sorry you’re so lonely. I’ll see what I can do to help you meet new people. Even if you were to pursue a friendship with him- I don’t want you to, mind, but if you were to do that anyway- being so isolated... it’s not healthy, but I thought you were happy with how things are. I’m sorry that I didn’t notice you weren’t.”

Thomas turned back to her, feeling bad about it. “I  _ am  _ happy. I don’t need to know the whole neighborhood, but just... having someone my age to be around would be great.”

She tilted her head. “He’s not your age.”

“He’s nineteen.”

“Is he? I thought he was in his twenties.”

“Did you ever ask him?”

“No, it was a guess.” She smiled wryly. “I guess that’s one less objection I can use. Just... let me see about helping you meet people. That’s all I ask.”

He sighed. “Fine. I’m tired, and we have to open the shop in five hours. We better get some sleep.”

“When you’re right, you’re right.” She turned back to the door to lock it. “Go on up and get to sleep. I’ll join you once I’m done here. I love you, Thomas.”

“Love you too, Aunt Saskia.”


	3. Chapter 3

Thomas gave up hoping that Asra would come around. All he could do was hope that Asra was happy and well. He wondered how much of his concern was because he believed Asra to be the soulmate his reading talked about, and how much it was because he genuinely cared about Asra. He had been right when he said they barely knew each other, but he wanted desperately to get to know him. He wanted to believe that would’ve been the same, with or without the reading.

Still, he didn’t think he would get lucky enough to find Asra again the day before the Masquerade again. He still planned to go out to the marketplace, wearing his nicest outfit, his heart fluttering with hope. 

Aunt Saskia gave him a fondly exasperated look when he ghosted past the counter. “Is there something you want to tell me?”

“No, I’m just going to the marketplace to look for trinkets for my costume-“

“Are you sure it has nothing to do with the delinquent outside who’s been pretending I can’t see him all morning?”

Thomas’s eyes widened. “He’s here? Asra’s here?”

She nodded. “Don’t get into trouble. Please, please be careful around him. You know I don’t like him.”

Thomas didn’t answer; he bolted for the door, looking around wildly. “Asra?”

He spotted Asra leaning against the back wall of the shop, arms crossed over his chest. A soft smile crossed his lips. “Hello, Thomas.”

“Asra!” The only thing keeping Thomas from hugging him was the fact that he didn’t want to scare him away. “I was- I was actually on my way to try to find you.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Aunt Saskia told me you were out here.”

“Oh.” His face colored. “I was trying to avoid being seen. I wanted to surprise you.”

“I’m surprised,” Thomas said, “pleasantly. I- I wanted to see you so much, but you never came back, and-“

“That’s why I’m here, actually.” Asra looked away. “I... I wanted to see you, too. I think we need to revisit our conversation last year.”

Thomas nodded. “Want to go for a walk with me?”

“Actually, I wanted to know if you wanted to get lunch with me. At the Raven. It’s a good atmosphere for talking.”

Thomas wasn’t sure he agreed, but he nodded all the same. “I’d love to. But I haven’t been there since last year, so I’m not exactly sure where it is.”

“That’s fine. I can lead us there. But- I just want to talk.”

“That’s fine,” Thomas repeated, and they started off together.

* * *

Thomas felt the breath knocked from his chest as his back hit the wall. He barely had time to gasp before Asra’s lips were on his, his body pinning him there as his hands felt his arms, his chest, his hips. Asra kissed him frantically, as if he was the air he needed to breathe. Thomas kissed back, open-mouthed, tongues sliding over each other. He made a desperate sound in the back of his throat as Asra pressed in closer, hands going to the sides of Thomas’s face.

When they parted for air, Asra pulled away. Thomas couldn’t stop a whine as he reached for him; Asra caught his hands, but didn’t push them away. “This is a profoundly bad idea,” Asra said, his voice ragged with desire. 

“I don’t care,” Thomas replied, fingers gripping Asra’s shirt and pulling him close again. Asra went willingly, sealing his lips over Thomas’s once more, Thomas’s fingers buried in Asra’s hair. He groaned soft and low as Asra pressed his hips to his, moving against him hard. 

Asra gave a gasp, and pulled away again, but didn't leave Thomas's space. "We barely know each other," he murmured against his lips, desire and wanting heavy in his voice.

It took all of Thomas's willpower to keep his voice even. "We can fix that," he replied, and snuck another kiss. Asra didn't resist him. "Come with me to the Masquerade."

That got his attention. He pulled away slightly more, frowning. "What? But I don't have a mask or a costume, or-"

"You stopped making those masks? They were beautiful!"

"No, I'm still making them. They're to sell. I can't just take one!"

"They're your masks," Thomas insisted. "You can do whatever you want with them. Didn't you give me one last year? One you could've very well have sold?"

"That's different, and even if I  _ did _ take a mask, I still have no costume!"

"You don't  _ need _ a costume for the Masquerade," Thomas replied. "The first one I went to, I didn't have a costume. I won't wear mine this year, if it makes you feel better. Just come with me this year." Asra still seemed hesitant, and Thomas pulled out all of the stops, giving him as wide-eyed, pleading a look as he could manage. "Please?"

"Oooh, how can I say no to that face?" Asra murmured. "Alright. I'll go with you tomorrow."

"You won't regret it. It's  _ fantastic _ ." Thomas kissed him again, and Asra chased after the kiss when he pulled away. "But it's getting late. I better get back to the shop."

Asra suppressed an unhappy, frustrated noise, and nodded. "That's- that's probably best, before something happens that we might regret."

His words sent a thrill of delight and desire through him. "I wouldn't regret it."

"We barely know each other," Asra repeated, "and do you know how uncomfortable sex is in an alleyway?"

Thomas raised an eyebrow. "Why, do  _ you  _ know?"

"No, and I'd prefer to keep it that way." Asra gave a flustered laugh, kissing him one last time and then backing away. Thomas took a deep breath, straightening his rumpled shirt, and stood up straight. "Where will we meet for the Masquerade?"

"Come to the shop when you're ready to go."

Asra looked at him in concern. "Is that wise? Won't your aunt see me?"

Thomas scoffed, "She  _ will _ see you, most likely, but we're doing nothing wrong. I'm not going to sneak behind her back. That's just going to make her opinion of you worse. I'm going to try to get her to be more reasonable about you, too. Her belief that you're  _ bad _ is irrational, and-"

"And how would you know that?" he challenged quietly. "For all you know, I'm terrible."

Thomas met his gaze evenly. "I know you're not," he replied quietly. "You've done nothing to make me think that you're terrible. The fact that you stopped us from going any farther proves that to me. I- I wasn't in control of myself. If you'd wanted to take advantage of that, you could have. You didn't."

"I don't like the idea of taking advantage of someone less experienced than me."

"See?" He peered at him. "So you  _ do _ have more experience than me."

Asra blushed, looking away. "Nothing serious. I know how to have fun. That's about all it was."

"See? A bad person would've had no problems taking advantage of me." He shot him a smile he hoped was reassuring. Asra made a noncommittal noise and the two of them left the alley, heading back to the main thoroughfare.

Asra sighed. "Things aren't always so cut and dried, Thomas."

"Well, let me ask you directly.  _ Are _ you a bad person?"

"I... I don't know. I've... done things. My situation is kind of precarious."

"It sounds like you're in trouble," Thomas murmured, stopping them. "Can I help?"

"I- no. Everything is- well, it's not  _ fine _ , but I've been in this situation for years. I'm used to it. My point is that 'good' and 'bad' are nebulous, at best. And to be honest, I'm... afraid."

"Of what?"

"Of getting you caught in my mess." He paused. "Of giving him another target to hold over my head."

Thomas's blood ran cold. "Him?"

"Count Lucio."

"You know Count Lucio?"

"Unfortunately." He sighed. "I... I don't want to talk about it. Suffice it to say that inviting  _ anyone _ into my life at this point would be stupid of me."

Thomas put a hand on his arm. "I'm not afraid of him," he said evenly. "You shouldn't have to deprive yourself of other people out of fear of someone else."

"You don't understand."

"Then explain it so I will."

Asra sighed, searching Thomas's hazel eyes. Finally, his shoulders slump. "He's blackmailing me," he whispered. "My friend- the one I live with- if I don't do things for the Count, things that are very likely very bad, Count Lucio says he'll hurt him."

Suddenly, Asra's remarks about Lucio from when they met made sense. It wasn't just a general disapproval of Lucio's policies. It was personal. Thomas cupped Asra's cheek gently, and Asra closed his eyes, leaning into the touch. "I'm not afraid of him," he said firmly. "I can take care of myself. I want... I want to be with you. Nothing you did for Lucio, none of Lucio's threats can change that."

Asra's voice was small, frightened. "I don't want you to get hurt."

"Do you want me?"

His eyes shined. "More than anything," he whispered, and turned his head to kiss Thomas's palm. Thomas put his arms around him, and they stood there in the street, embracing. Thomas could feel the tension ebbing from Asra's shoulders as they stood together in the moonlight. Asra's embrace tightened as he buried his face in Thomas's shoulder, and Thomas tangled one hand in Asra's hair. Asra turned his face to kiss Thomas's neck, lips barely brushing skin. Thomas suppressed a shudder as Asra pulled away. There was determination in his eyes, and a measure of peace that hadn't been there before. "Let's get you home before your aunt sends the city guard out to find you."

When they started walking this time, Asra took Thomas's hand. They walked in companionable silence for several blocks, until Asra said, "I should bring Faust to meet you."

"Faust? Is that your friend?" 

He shook his head. "My friend doesn't do well with meeting new people. He- he knows  _ of _ you, of course, but I think we should get to know each other better before I bring you to meet him. Faust is my familiar."

Thomas's interest was immediately piqued. "You have a familiar? What's that like?"

Asra gave him a sideways glance. "You don't have a familiar?"

"No." He made a face. "Aunt Saskia insists that we have no pets, and she also insists that familiars are little more than glorified pets."

"I think her dislike of me is mutual," Asra replied dryly. "Faust is so much more than just a pet. She's- well- she's my companion. She's a focus for my magic. She's been with me since I was very small." He gave Thomas a smile. "It's her fault I came to see you today, in fact. She insisted that I at least give you a chance."

"I think I like her already," Thomas said brightly, smiling back. 

"Yes. I think you two would get along handsomely." A flicker of doubt crossed his face. "The thing about familiars, though, is that they can communicate with their magician- and no one else. She'll- well- she won't be an  _ ordinary _ snake, but you won't be able to communicate with her like I can."

"So she's a snake, huh?" Thomas smiled broadly. "We have to bring her by the shop. Aunt Saskia would love her."

"If she refuses to have pets, will she allow Faust in?"

"As long as you have control of her, it should be fine." Thomas looked forward again. "And maybe this will help her see you as a person rather than just someone from the wrong side of town."

"Technically I'm not from town at all." Asra gave him a cheeky grin. "If it helps her accept me, then I'll do it. But let's talk about this after the Masquerade. She'd rightly be suspicious of me right now, given that- y'know- we barely-"

"Don't you say it-"

"-know each other."

Thomas burst into peals of laughter, and Asra quickly followed suit. "Well," he said, wiping tears from his eyes, "we know our sense of humor is similar."

"Always a good sign." By then, they had reached the shop, and Asra turned to Thomas, taking his hands in his. "I'll see you tomorrow in time for the Masquerade. Wait for me." He bent slightly and brushed his lips against Thomas's cheek. 

Thomas wanted to turn his head, wanted to catch Asra's lips on his, but he knew that Saskia was probably watching. Even this chaste kiss on the cheek was dangerous. "I will," Thomas whispered back. "Don't forget about me."

"I could never forget about you." Asra pulled away, hesitantly. "Good night, Thomas."

"Good night. Be safe."

With that, Asra turned and started walking away, and Thomas stood there in front of the shop, watching him, before turning and going into the shop. Saskia was sitting behind the counter, looking at her hands. "You're letting him kiss you now?"

Thomas's face flushed. "It was one kiss on the cheek," he said, trying to put their makeout session out of his head. Aunt Saskia knew him, and knew when he was lying to her. He did  _ not _ want her to know what they had done in the alley behind the Rowdy Raven. "I wish you would stop overreacting to him."

She sighed. "Nothing I say is going to get through to you, is it? He's using you. That's all it is."

"What, exactly, is he getting out of it?" Thomas asked her blankly. When she didn't respond, he said, almost smugly, "Thought so."

"Don't take that tone with me, young man." Her voice was mild, much milder than Thomas expected it to be. "I can't explain it other than a bone-deep feeling. I trust my intuition, Thomas, and you used to, too. He's going to hurt you. I don't want that to happen."

Thomas steeled himself. He was going to put a stop to this right now, if he had to. "If he hurts me," he said in a calm, quiet voice, "that will be something for  _ me _ to deal with. I'm an adult, Aunt Saskia. I can decide who I keep company with."

"You aren't an adult," Saskia replied, just as calmly. "You're eighteen years old. You're a teenager, Thomas. You're still a child even by Vesuvian legal standards." She paused. "But Asra is an adult."

He rolled his eyes. "There's a two-year difference, Aunt Saskia. He just happened to reach the threshold before I did. He's still in my age group, legal threshold be damned."

"It's still an issue. I'm telling you this for his good as much as your own. If you're caught doing anything inappropriate with him, he could get in trouble. The law doesn't allow for  _ any _ inappropriate contact between adults and minors."

Thomas hadn't known that. He wondered if Asra did, if that was why he put the brakes on their activities so fast. "Who's going to turn him in?" he asked quietly. "You?"

She sighed again. "No. As long as he's not forcing you into anything you don't want, I wouldn't do that. I don't dislike him  _ that _ much, and I know full well he's still within your age group. That's not to say someone else who knows him wouldn't. Even if you're right, and he has no ill or selfish intentions towards you, if you get entangled with him, and someone does decide to turn him in for it? That's going to hurt you, too. A  _ lot _ . I can't stop you from doing something foolish but if this is the hill you plan to die on, keep it just friends until you're legally an adult.  _ Please _ ."

For the first time since they met, what Saskia was saying gave him pause. He didn't want Asra to get in trouble, and he didn't want to be the cause of that trouble. "I'll... well... I'll keep that in mind," he said uncomfortably. "But we were talking, and... he wants to meet you. Properly meet you. Maybe if you get to know him, you'll feel better about him. He'll bring his familiar, and we can all have a nice talk."

Saskia looked like she wanted to refuse. Thomas held her gaze hopefully, and she finally nodded. "That may be a good idea. I don't want you to start hiding this from me, and... and I know damn well that'll be your next step. I'll meet with him, and we'll see how things go."

"Good." He heaved a sigh of relief. "I'm not wearing my costume to the Masquerade tomorrow. I'm going with Asra, and he'll just have a mask. I don't want to make him feel out of place or awkward."

"Ah, I'm going to have to ask that you come home early then."

"Aunt Saskia-"

"Humor me, Thomas, please. I'm just worried about you."

_ You're suffocating me, that's what you are _ , Thomas thought viciously. He kept it to himself, though, instead sighing. "Fine. What time do you want me home?"

"Ten. Before you-" As Thomas groaned, she raised her voice, "-get upset with me, that's plenty of time for you to properly introduce us before the end of the night."

"Already?" Thomas blinked. "I'm not sure he's ready for that."

"Well, that's my condition for allowing this at all. Take it or leave it, kiddo."

"I'll take it. And I'll bring him home tomorrow to meet you, I promise."

"Good. Now, you're going to have a long night tomorrow regardless of when you come home, so I'd prefer it if you went up to bed now. I'll close up and join you shortly. I love you. Please never forget that. You're like a son to me."

Thomas's eyes widened at that. She'd never said that to him before. "I- I love you too, Aunt Saskia," he murmured. "Don't- don't be up too late. You're going to be up late tomorrow, too."

"Mm. Good night, Thomas."

"Good night."

~*~

Thomas waited impatiently outside of the shop, pacing, mask in his hand. It was the one he'd used the previous year; he'd completely forgotten to ask Asra if he could pick out a new one. The longer he waited, the more Thomas thought that perhaps Asra had gotten cold feet. The thought made him want to cry. He decided after the third hour of waiting that if Asra didn't show, he wouldn't go to the Masquerade, either. He had his hopes set on going with Asra. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Saskia in the window, watching him, a sad look on her face. He shot her an uneasy, unhappy smile, and resumed pacing.

He startled as someone wrapped their arms around his shoulders from behind. "Hello," came Asra's cheerful voice, embracing him. "How long have you been pacing? You're making a ditch."

Thomas's face immediately brightened, and he turned. Asra didn't let go. "I've been pacing for almost four hours."

Asra gave a disbelieving laugh. "I'm sorry to have made you wait so long," he said, grinning. "If I'd have known you'd be exhausting yourself before the dancing I'd have been here much sooner."

"Well, you're here now." Thomas gave him a genuine, bright smile. And then it faded. "Ah, though, us going together has a catch."

"Uh-oh. I'm not sure I like the sound of that. What's the catch?"

"I have to be home by ten- and I have to bring you with me to talk to Aunt Saskia." 

Thomas never thought he'd see someone go through the stages of grief as fast as Asra did. The expressions crossed his face one after the other, ending on resignation. "Alright. If that's what it takes, I'll do it."

Thomas threw his arms around Asra's neck and hugged him close. "Thanks," he murmured in Asra's ear. "Well, shall we?"

"We shall." Asra pulled away and took Thomas's hand. Thomas glanced back towards the shop as they started walking away. Saskia had watched the entire exchange, and he saw vague disapproval on her face; but he also saw relief. Seeing that she was glad for him lightened his mood, and they started walking.

Asra showed him his mask as they walked, and described the inspiration for it. "It's something I saw in my personal gateway," he said proudly.

Thomas looked up at him blankly. "Personal gateway?"

A look of surprise came over Asra's face. "You've never heard of personal gateways?" Thomas shook his head, and Asra sighed. "It was... a matter of necessity, in my case. Of self-preservation. I needed somewhere to go when things got overwhelming, somewhere to hide and just rest."

"What- what is it?"

Asra smiled. "It is a gateway into the magical realms. You remember how the cards spoke to you, right?" Thomas nodded, and Asra said, "Well, each of those cards- the archtypes- have their own realms, in the world beyond ours. The magical realms. A personal gateway is a magician's way to those realms."

Thomas's eyes shone. "Can you teach me how to go there?"

Asra chuckled at Thomas's eagerness. "I'd be happy to. Just... not today."

"Of course not."

Thomas talked a little bit about his magic, giving Asra an idea of what he was capable of. "Did your aunt teach you everything?" Thomas nodded, and Asra made a thoughtful noise. "Some of what you're describing is beyond my capabilities. I would love to learn everything you know, too. Maybe we can teach each other."

The thought made Thomas blush. "I don't know if I'd make a good teacher."

"I don't know if I would, either. But it's a way of getting to know each other."

"This is true." 

They reached the palace gates and were escorted in with the rest of the group that had gathered, and ushered to the ballroom. From there, they could go anywhere they wanted. Asra turned to Thomas, the partygoers milling about them. "Are you hungry?" Asra asked. "I am. I hear the food here is delightful."

Thomas nodded eagerly. "It is. Except you have no idea what you're eating. Everything is hidden in boxes that had been enchanted to prevent the person from seeing what's in it."

"That sounds fascinating. Where is it usually?"

"Come on, I'll show you."

Thomas grabbed Asra's hand, guiding him out of the ballroom and into a large banquet hall, tables filled with boxes, all lavishly decorated. “This is fantastic,” he murmured. He held onto Thomas’s hand as he made his way to one of the tables. There was a box there, covered with chipped opal that caught the light and shimmered in every color of the rainbow. “Want to do the first honors?” he asked, grinning as he handed Thomas the box. 

Thomas grinned back and opened it, taking a bite of what was inside. “It’s some kind of grilled meat,” Thomas reported. “It’s delicious. Here, try it.”

Asra took the box from him, and took and small bite from it. His eyes widened and he looked down on it in shock. “Oh, this one’s mine,” he announced. “Sorry, Thomas, but I’m not sharing this one.”

Thomas laughed. “Why? Recognize the taste? What is it?”

“Blue-tongued skink,” he said, clearly delighted, and happily ate the rest. While Asra polished that box off, Thomas picked up one decorated with candied violets, and took a bite. It was a fluffy chiffon cake that absolutely melted in Thomas’s mouth. 

The pair made their way around the room, sampling boxes as they went. By the time they had made their way around completely, Thomas was satisfied, and he could tell that Asra was as well. “That was delicious,” Asra announced.

“It was,” Thomas said with a grin. “Want to come dance with me now?”

“I’d be delighted to.”

They led each other back out to the ballroom, where a band was playing a lively tune. Asra looked ecstatically happy as he took Thomas’s hand and put the other on his hip. Thomas’s free hand found Asra’s shoulder, and the two began to dance. They were both a little unsure at first, but found a rhythm quickly, pushing and pulling together to the lively beat of the music. “You’re a natural,” Asra said, leading Thomas into a spin.

Thomas let himself be pulled back into Asra’s embrace. “I’m surprised at how good  _ you  _ are,” he said.

Asra leaned in close and whispered, “I’ve been told I’m talented in a  _ lot _ of ways. I can’t wait to show you.”

A shiver ran down Thomas’s spine, and he just couldn’t resist the urge to lean in and kiss him, hard. Asra surged forward, returning the kiss, even more passionately than he had been behind the Raven. 

A loud, obnoxious voice broke the spell just as the song shifted to a slower, more romantic pace. “Asraaaaa! Introduce me to your lover there! I didn’t know you were seeing anyone!”

Asra broke the kiss, cringing away. “Count Lucio,” he greeted, turning to face him. The ice in his voice made Thomas physically shiver; he could  _ feel  _ Asra’s hatred, radiating off of him like a furnace. “I haven’t told you because I haven’t seen you since it started.”

The count gave them an indulgent smile. “Oh? When did it start?”

“Last night.”

There was a hint of cruelty in Lucio’s voice. “Does he know what he’s getting into?”

“As a matter of fact, I do,” Thomas interjected, more to shield Asra than anything else. He extended a hand. “My name is Thomas. My aunt operates a magic shop a little bit past the marketplace.”

Lucio looked him over, then took his hand with his alchemical one and squeezed firmly. Thomas thought he might’ve been trying to intimidate him. He set his jaw and returned the handshake firmly.

“Now that you mention it,” Lucio said slowly, releasing him, “I seem to recall meeting you last year. Or was it the year before?”

“The year before, Sir.”

“Ah. Did you know each other then?”

“Barely, but yes.”

Lucio gave a delighted laugh, reaching out and wrapping his arm around Asra’s shoulders. Asra visibly tensed, his fingers curling into tight fists. “I’d be careful around him if I were you. He’s trouble. Aren’t you, Asra?”

Asra’s voice was tight as he replied in a sickly sweet voice, “Not as much trouble as you, Lucio.”

“You got that right!” Lucio laughed boisterously, setting Thomas’s nerves on edge. “Seriously, though- be on your guard around him, Thomas. He  _ does  _ have a way of finding trouble. You never know what kind of  _ problems _ getting close to him will cause you.”

“I’d appreciate it if you stopped trying to scare off my boyfriend,” Asra spat.

“Temper temper.” Lucio’s tone was mocking.

Thomas was too stunned by what Asra had called him to join in his protest. He had called him his boyfriend. Did he really mean that?

Before anyone could say anything else, though, a deep, feminine voice snapped, “Lucio!” and all attention turned to the woman approaching them, owl mask fixed to her face. An auburn-haired man followed at her heels, wearing a mask that looked like a crow. He seemed impossibly tall to Thomas.

The woman pulled her mask off as she approached. “Give Asra some room to breathe,” she scolded. “You’re embarrassing him.”

“Embarrassing him? Nonsense, Noddy! He’s like my little brother! Aintcha, Asra?” Lucio’s unwelcome embrace tightened around Asra’s shoulders, fingers digging in. Thomas could see even with the mask that Asra wanted to punch him.

“Uh, well, older siblings often do make a game of embarrassing the younger ones,” the red headed man said mildly. “That’s just the nature of the relationship.”

“Oh? And how would you know that, Jules?”

He shrugged, taking a drink from a wine glass in his hand. “I have a little sister. And I can guarantee that you’re embarrassing Asra.”

Lucio’s eyes glittered with something unpleasant, his smile turning to a smirk. “Since when do  _ you _ speak for him?”

“We can see his expression, Lucio,” the woman said dryly. “There are a few diplomats from Drakr in the planetarium. They’ve been waiting patiently for a chance to talk to you. This might be your best bet at resolving the trade crisis.”

Lucio let go of Asra, whining sharply, “This is a birthday party, Noddy! I don’t want to work  _ now! _ ”

“Who said you have to work? Just go talk with them a bit. I’ll join you in a few minutes.”

He heaved a sigh. “Fine, fine. Remember what I said about Asra causing trouble, Thomas. I would just  _ hate  _ to see a nice young man like you caught up in one of his messes.” 

With that, Lucio walked away. Asra was shaking. “Thanks, countess,” he murmured, shifting into Thomas’s arms.

The countess’s eyes lit up in interest at the motion. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” Thomas rubbed his back soothingly as Asra straightened, arm around Thomas’s shoulders. “I should introduce you. Thomas, this is Countess Nadia and Doctor Devorak. They’re my... friends.”

Asra was unsure of himself. Nadia and the doctor smiled, their expressions open and friendly, not at all like Lucio’s. Nadia extended a hand to Thomas, and he took and kissed it. “Oh my,” Nadia teased, “handsome  _ and  _ smooth. Did I hear you right when you said he is your boyfriend, Asra?”

As she spoke, Asra’s shaking eased and his tense muscles relaxed. “He is,” he said, “since last night.”

Doctor Devorak’s smile wavered, so fast Thomas wasn’t sure he’d seen it. “Have you known each other long?” he asked.

“Three years, technically,” Thomas answered with a smile of his own. “Although we’re just starting to really get to know each other.”

“Ah. Don’t let the count scare you off. He’s a keeper.”

“Doctor-“ Asra started.

“Ilya, Asra. You know my name. Use it.”

Thomas got the sense that this was a point of contention between them as Asra murmured an apology and looked away. “I already told him all about Lucio. If that didn’t scare him away, I’m not sure anything will.”

“Mm, I hope you’re right. It’s nice to see you with someone your own age for a change.” Nadia’s gaze slid pointedly to Ilya and then back to Asra and Thomas. Ilya’s face flushed under his mask, but he murmured an agreement. “We better get to the planetarium and rescue those poor diplomats. Enjoy the party, you two.”

Nadia and Ilya wandered away, and Asra turned to Thomas. He looked like he wanted to leave. “And  _ that’s  _ why I never attended this party before,” he said with a wavering grin.

“Do you want to go?”

“Only if you do.”

Thomas felt the merciful thing would be to leave. “Let’s go. We’ve got one more harrowing meeting to get through before the night is over and I’d rather you not be alone after it.”

“If I can handle Lucio, I can handle your aunt.” Still, he seemed relieved that Thomas was so ready to leave, and Asra led him quickly out of the palace, walking fast enough that Thomas had trouble keeping up. He slowed down considerably as they crossed the bridge, taking a deep, cleansing breath. “Better?” Thomas prompted, trying to hide his breathlessness.

“Better. You sound like you just ran a marathon.”

“You're fast when you want to be.”

Asra’s face colored. “Sorry. I just... really needed to get out of there.”

“It’s alright.” Thomas took a breath to steady himself, and then laced his fingers with Asra’s again. “Well, let’s go get this over with.”

“Yes, let’s.” Asra looked forward as they started walking again, pulling his mask off. Thomas did the same as Asra spoke. “I’ll be glad when this is done- but we still have to introduce you to Muriel.”

“Muriel?”

“My friend.” He grimaced. “He... might be a problem. He’s already decided he doesn’t like you. I’ve asked him to be reasonable, and I think he’s going to at least make an effort, but once he’s made his mind up about something, it’s hard to get him to change it.”

Thomas grimaced. “Is this going to cause problems for us?”

“No. He’s... he’s the only family I have, but I’m my own person. It’ll cause less trouble than if we can’t bring your aunt around, anyway.”

Thomas considered asking him what had happened to his family, but he was afraid that wouldn’t go over very well. Asra was opening up to him, but he didn’t want to rush it and spook him. Instead, he said, “I can empathize, a little bit. As far as I’m concerned, Aunt Saskia is my only family. I don’t remember my mother and from what she tells me, I don’t care to.”

“That’s fair, from what you’ve told me.”

Companionable silence descended as they made their way back to the shop. Thomas unlocked the door, discovering that Saskia hadn’t enchanted it yet. She was sitting behind the counter, reading a book by the light of a magical lantern, and looked up with a start. “Thomas. I wasn’t expecting you for another two hours, at least.”

Asra cleared his throat. “That’s my fault. I don’t do well in crowds. I thought I’d be fine for just a few hours, but- well.” He shrugged helplessly.

“I- I see.” Saskia set her gaze on him, curious, but with an undercurrent of suspicion. Regardless, she stood and approached them, extending a hand. “We’ve never properly introduced ourselves. I’m Saskia. It is a... pleasure... to finally truly meet you, Asra.”

Asra’s face colored again; they had both heard the sour note beneath her conciliatory tones. He took her hand, shaking firmly. “Likewise. Thomas adores you. I hope we can be friends- for his sake, if nothing else.”

Saskia’s eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly. “Indeed. Come to the back room with me, let’s have a chat, get to know each other.”

She let go of him and went to the back room. Asra shot Thomas an unsure look, but at Thomas’s nod, squared his shoulders and followed her, Thomas trailing behind.

Asra and Thomas settled into stools beside each other, Saskia on the other side of them. There was uncomfortable silence before Saskia spoke. “Well, we need to start somewhere. You’ve been on the street since we arrived in Vesuvia all those years ago. What happened to your parents?”

Asra flinched, and Thomas spoke up. “Did you have to go for his jugular right out of the gate?”

A look of remorse flirted across her face before Asra said, “Its alright. It’s a fair question. They died.”

“I see. Did you have no other family to take you in?”

He shook his head. “My grandparents all died before I was born and my parents were only children. The first few years were hard. I met another orphan a bit after I was on my own, and we helped each other, but it’s rough, being a child with no adults to rely on.”

“I can only imagine.” There was compassion in her voice; not the reaction either of them expected. “What changed that made it easier after the first few years?”

Asra shifted uncomfortably, and Thomas spoke up. “Do we need to discuss this?”

“It’s fine, Thomas. I’m fine.” He met Saskia’s even gaze. “I made a friend- another orphan. We watched out for each other.”

“Is Thomas going to be spending time around him?”

“I want them to meet- he’s like a brother to me- but-“ Asra’s mouth twisted in a wry grin- “you’re not the only one mistrustful of this. And no matter how overprotective you are, he’s worse.”

Alarmed, Saskia asked, “He wouldn’t get violent, would he?”

Asra laughed. “Muriel wouldn’t hurt a fly. I just have to listen to all the reasons city folk like you can’t be trusted on a nightly basis.”

Saskia relaxed. “So you have somewhere to go now? Someplace to call home?”

“It’s not much, but yes. Why? Being homeless would disqualify me from being with your nephew?”

She sighed. “I suppose I deserved that. No. If you had nowhere to go, I’d have found you someplace. You can’t stay here- it’s cramped enough between Thomas and I- but I wouldn’t let you continue to founder in the streets. I don’t understand it but you’re important to Thomas. That’s enough for me to want to help.”

Thomas could tell that Asra felt bad for the dig at her now. “I see. That’s not necessary. I have somewhere to go now.”

“That’s good. So, are you a magician, or just a fortune teller?”

“Magician. Mostly self-taught.” He leaned forward eagerly. “Thomas and I have talked about what each of us know. We can really learn from each other. Did you train Thomas?”

“I did.” He caught a shimmer of pride in her eyes. “I’m assuming he hasn’t had a reason yet to use his magic in front of you, but he’s a remarkably talented magician. I’m sure there are things he could teach  _ me _ at this point.”

“Aunt Saskia,” Thomas all but whined. 

“Let her talk you up,” Asra teased, his eyes glittering. “I already know you’re incredible. I want to hear how much now.”

“Asra-“

“How about this?” Saskia said mischievously. “We all share something we’d like to teach each other, and we’ll see who’s going to teach who.”

“I’m game!” Asra replied brightly. 

Both of them looked to Thomas, his face flushed. He sighed and shrugged. “I guess so, but I don’t know anything you don’t, Aunt Saskia.”

“So you can focus on Asra.”

“Alright, fine. Who goes first?”

“I will.” Asra’s eyes twinkled in the lantern light. “Although I can only go into the theory without an intensive teaching session. I’ve told Thomas about this, but- Miss Saskia. Have you ever heard of magician’s gateways?”


	4. Chapter 4

Thomas could tell Saskia still didn’t like Asra, still didn’t trust him, but something in that conversation changed how she saw him. There were no more admonitions to beware of letting Asra close, and she even often asked how he was doing, and if he was okay if she hadn’t seen him in a while. 

For his part, Asra kept a healthy distance from her, respecting her dislike of him. He was the calm, rational one between the two of them. He was the one who cooled things down when they started getting too heated, the one who talked Thomas out of doing risky things, like when he suggested they try to open their own place. “You’re not even an adult in the eyes of the law,” Asra said, as he very gently shot the idea down. “It’s not that I don’t want to do that, but we have time. There’s no rush.”

“I want to  _ be with you,  _ Asra. If we were in Sesarach-“

“But we’re not. We’re in Vesuvia. Patience, Thomas. Trust me, it’ll be worth the wait.”

But Thomas could feel Asra’s resistance wearing thin. Every time they were together, he let it get a little further before stopping it, and his firmness in his rejections wavered, until one day, it was Thomas who objected. “We should stop,” Thomas gasped, pulling away from Asra. It was the night of the Masquerade, and Thomas had chosen to stay home that night. Saskia had gone to Nopal, leaving him in charge of the shop. He wasn’t expecting her home for two days still. He hadn’t meant to let things between him and Asra get heated at all, but one kiss had led to another. They had divested each other of their shirts, and Thomas’s belt was undone. 

Asra was kissing along his shoulder up to his neck. “I don’t want to,” Asra breathed. “I will if you say you want to stop, but if this is because of me-“

Thomas pulled away, heart racing. “Are you saying what I think you are?”

Asra cupped his face in his hand, leaned forward and kissed him gently. “I want you,” he whispered, “and I don’t want to wait anymore. I want you. Please-“

Asra’s plea was cut off as Thomas surged forward, pressing his lips to Asra’s again, a desperate edge in every movement. Asra brought his hands up to Thomas’s sides, gripping his hips as he straddled Asra’s waist. A nag of doubt said in the back of his mind that he needed to stop this, that this was a profoundly bad idea. Thomas shut the nagging voice out, losing himself to Asra’s touch.

* * *

An hour later, Thomas laid in Asra’s arms, sleepy in his contentment. Asra’s arms tightened around him, and Thomas drew himself up onto an elbow, looking down at him. “Are you hungry?”

Asra gave a little laugh, blushing deeply. Maybe a little. You worked me up into an appetite.”

“Want to go get something to eat?” He bent and kissed his jaw behind his ear. “I know a little pub a block away that stays open all night, and they have some of the most delicious appetizers I’ve ever had.” He paused, then teased, “They also have fried skink.”

Asra’s face brightened. “Any chance that’s blue tongued skink?”

“I have no idea. If it is, it isn’t advertised as such.”

Asra thought about it for a second. “Skink is tasty even if it’s not blue-tongued. Let’s go.”

They dressed in companionable, contented silence, and Thomas led the way down the stairs. Just as he was about to emerge into the shop, he stopped short, his heart leaping into his throat. Saskia sat at the shop counter. She looked up as he descended the last stair, too surprised to stop himself. “Aunt Saskia.”

Behind him, he felt Asra tense. Saskia looked him dead in the eyes and demanded, “How long?”

“I don’t know what you’re-“

“How long have you been sleeping with him?”

Thomas swallowed hard. It was better to be honest. “Tonight was the first time.”

Her voice was low and simmering with anger. “Good. It will be the last.”

“Aunt Saskia-“

“No. I asked you to wait until you were twenty, fully an adult, and you couldn’t even do that for me. This is over for now. If he actually cares about you he’ll be willing to wait for you for half a year.”

Cold dread spread from Thomas’s chest, the thought of what she was saying unbearable. He squared his shoulders. “No.”

Behind him, Asra’s fingers brushed his shoulder. “Thomas, everyone’s upset right now. Maybe we should let everyone cool off and-“

“Shut up, Asra,” Thomas threw over his shoulder flatly. Asra’s fingers stiffened, but he didn’t pull away.

Saskia heard him, though. Thomas could see it in her gaze. “He’s right, you know,” she said coolly. “If you’re not going to listen to me, then maybe you should listen to  _ him. _ ”

“I don’t need to. I’m not upset, and I’m not letting you force us apart for half a year.  _ I love him. _ ” Asra’s soft gasp, the way his fingers tightened ever so slightly on his shoulder, threatened to distract him. He forced himself to stay focused. 

“You’re nineteen years old. You don’t know what love  _ is _ , Thomas! And I’m not going to have you doing things like this under my roof, either. Not while I’m still responsible for your wellbeing.”

“Fine then. We won’t be under your roof then. Come on, Asra.”

Without another word, Thomas stride across the shop floor. He heard Asra behind him, startled, rushing to catch up to him. “Thomas!” Saskia cried as he reached the door. “Don’t do something you can’t take back!”

Without looking at her, he slammed the door open and strode out into the night air, Asra on his heels. They walked together for several blocks before Asra asked, “Where exactly are we going?”

Thomas stopped, turned slowly to him, shaking his head. “I... I don’t know where I’m going,” he admitted. “You’re going home, though. I’m not going to make you pay for my temper.”

Asra reached out and caressed Thomas’s cheek. Thomas closed his eyes and dipped his face into the gesture. “And I’m not going to have you on the street,” he murmured. “Come home with me.”

Thomas smiled wryly. “I’m as welcome there as you’re welcome at the shop.”

Asra shook his head. “Once I’ve explained the situation to Muriel, he won’t have a problem with it. You come with me to the woods, or I follow you on the streets all night. Your choice.”

Sighing, Thomas nodded. “We’ll try the woods. I’m sorry, Asra.”

“You did nothing to apologize for,” he murmured, and put his arm around his shoulders. As they started walking again, Asra said, “I think that happened the only way it could have. If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine. I pressured you into-“

Thomas cut him off with a laugh. “You didn’t pressure me into anything and I don’t regret it. I could never regret being with you. I- I meant what I told Aunt Saskia.”

“Thomas- I- I-“

Thomas stopped and put a finger to his lips. “I don’t expect you to say it back and I’ll refrain until you’re comfortable with it. But she had to understand that this is serious for me. Admitting it was the fastest way of getting there.”

Asra responded by kissing his finger. Thomas smiled, a touch sadly, and they kept walking.

They found Asra and Muriel’s hut easily enough in the dark, and Asra released the protections on the door and entered, Thomas on his heels. Muriel looked up from his wood carving by the fire. “Asra. I expected you to spend the night at-“ He saw Thomas and cut himself off, eyes narrowing at him. 

Thomas held his breath as Asra said quickly, “Saskia came home early. We were... caught. They argued over me and Saskia told him that I wasn’t welcome under her roof anymore, so he told her he wouldn’t be under her roof either, and- here we are.”

“So you brought him here.”

“I didn’t have a choice, Muriel. I wasn’t going to send him back and I sure as hell wasn't going to let him spend the night on the street somewhere.” Still, Muriel glared, and Asra begged, “We have nowhere else to go tonight.”

“We?”

“If you make him leave, I’m going with him.”

Muriel scowled, but that seemed to be what Muriel needed to hear to drop the issue. “Just for tonight,” he muttered. “If he needs someplace to be after tonight, we can... talk.”

“Thank you, Muriel,” Thomas murmured. “I plan to go back tomorrow and see if we can’t work this out civilly. I’ll sleep on the floor.”

Muriel said nothing, until Asra said, “I’ll sleep on the floor with you.”

“Neither of you are sleeping on the floor,” Muriel grumbled. “I’ll be on the floor with Inanna. I’m used to it. You’re not.”

Thomas again murmured thanks. It was a show of kindness Thomas hadn’t expected. There was terse silence as they prepared for bed; at one point, as Thomas sat on the edge of the bed, Inanna came over to him and rested her head on Thomas’s knee. Thomas ran his hand over her thick fur, watching Asra and Muriel across the room, whispering fiercely at each other. “I hope they’re not fighting about this,” he muttered to the wolf. “I’ve caused enough problems tonight already.” Inanna gave a soft whuff and licked his hand, and he smiled down at her. “At least you still like me, Inanna.”

At that, Inanna perked and pulled away from him, crossing the room. She gently took Asra’s shirt in her teeth and pulled, shifting their attention to her. Muriel seemed to focus on her intently for a second, then sighed and whispered something to Asra. Asra’s eyes widened, and he immediately came back over to Thomas, an easy smile on his lips. “What are you saying to Inanna that has her worried about you?”

Thomas shook his head. “It’s not important.”

“It is to me.” He sat on the edge of the bed next to him. “You might as well tell me. Inanna told Muriel and Muriel told me.”

Thomas looked at the wolf in wonder. “Is she Muriel’s familiar?”

“Why are you changing the subject?”

Thomas sighed. “I’ve caused so much trouble tonight. Aunt Saskia’s mad at me. I’m imposing on Muriel. I embarrassed you-“

“Hold it right there. What makes you think you embarrassed me?”

Thomas shifted uncomfortably. “Well, for one, I didn’t try to hide the fact that we’d slept together.”

“I didn’t want you to hide it, but go on.”

That made him feel marginally better. “And I told her that I love you without consulting with you first.”

That got a blank stare. “How in the world would that embarrass me?”

Thomas looked at his hands. “You’re not ready to say it. If you were, you would have by now.”

“Yes, well-“ Asra cast around for something to say to that. “Thomas, I- I care for you, deeper and more completely than I’ve ever cared for anyone else. Maybe that’s love. I don’t know. I’ve never been in love before. But if you’re sure of it, then- it makes me happy to know it.”

“You’re not just saying that?”

Asra sighed. “You’re ridiculous sometimes, you know that?” He kissed him on the nose, then properly on the mouth. “Let’s get some sleep. We’re going to have a busy day tomorrow. If you can’t work this out with Saskia, then we need to find a new home.”

“We?” Thomas arched an eyebrow.

Asra smiled. “Yes, we. I’m going with you, if you’re striking out on your own. I would follow you to the ends of the earth to be with you.”

Thomas put his arms around him. “Thank you, Asra.”

* * *

Thomas couldn’t get to sleep. He laid awake, eyes closed, focused on his breathing to try and relax. The fact that he wasn’t entirely welcome there kept him awake; the fact that the conversation he needed to have with Saskia would be awkward kept him awake; Asra’s refusal to say that he loved him kept him awake. 

Breathe. Focus on your breath. Inhale, hold it, exhale, hold it. He managed to get through five repetitions of it when Asra’s whispering voice got his attention. “Muriel? Are you awake?”

After a moment, Muriel whispered back, “I’m awake.”

“I really need to talk to someone.”

“Wake up your boyfriend.”

“It’s about him.”

“You definitely should wake him up, then.” Regardless, he heard the big man shifting on the floor. “What’s wrong?”

“When Saskia told Thomas to break up with me, he refused.”

“So? Did you expect him to do it?”

“He- he said he loves me.”

Muriel was quiet for a number of moments before he repeated, “So?”

“So what am I supposed to do about it?”

Sighing, Muriel asked, “Do you love him?”

Asra didn’t answer right away. “I don’t know. I- I think I do.”

He could sense Muriel shaking his head, as Thomas’s heart skipped a beat at the admission. “Think isn’t good enough for this, Asra. You absolutely do not want to say you love someone before you’re sure of it.”

“What if- What if I am? Sure of it.”

“If you are, then tell him. He has a right to know.”

Asra seemed to think about it, then leaned over Thomas and brushed a featherlight kiss on his cheek. “I love you,” he whispered, sounding as if he were testing the phrase out.

Thomas struggled to keep his breathing controlled, his heart full and almost bursting. Asra loved him. He  _ loved  _ him. Muriel snorted. “That doesn’t count.”

“Let me get used to this before I go saying it when he can hear me.”

Muriel snorted again, and settled back down. “Go to sleep, Asra. Good night.”

“Good night, Muriel. Thanks. For everything.”

“... welcome.”

* * *

Thomas didn’t get much sleep that night. He was too distracted by the soaring joy he felt. Asra loved him. It didn’t matter what Saskia had to say. They were in love, both of them, and they would make it alright on their own. They had each other. In fact, Thomas debated telling Saskia that he was going to find a home with Asra, regardless of how receptive she was to him now. 

He brought it up to Asra the next day, as they walked back to the city. "I'm not sure that's a good idea," Asra said hesitantly. He opened his mouth to continue talking, but closed it, keeping his eyes trained to the ground.

"There's a 'but' there," Thomas observed quietly.

He sighed. "But I want to," he admitted. "You- I've never been happier than I've been with you. For the longest time I was just drifting along life, nothing but stubbornness keeping me alive. I never wanted to  _ die _ , but there were times I wondered what the point was." He paused. "And then you showed up, and everything changed. I want to spend every day with you, every minute with you... but I'm not sure any landlord would rent a place to a minor. I could do it myself, but..." He winced. "I wasn't exactly honest growing up."

"You're honest now," Thomas insisted. "I'm sure we could find someplace, someone who doesn't know you from your youth."

"Maybe. Let's see how this conversation with your aunt goes."

"Alright."

They finished the walk into the city in companionable silence, heading for the shop. Thomas released the wards on it and unlocked it, calling out, "Aunt Saskia? Can we-"

His voice trailed off as his gaze fell on the shop's counter. There was a piece of paper there; frowning, Thomas went to the counter and picked it up, starting to read. The color drained from his face and Asra rushed forward, putting his hands on his shoulders, bracing him, afraid he was going to pass out. "What is it?" Asra asked, dread spreading over him.

Thomas started reading. His voice cracked at first, then he cleared his throat and tried again: "Dearest Thomas, I am so sorry you've been made to feel that you can't be here. It was never my intention to drive you away. Everything I've done- all the talks, the warnings- have been because I love you, and I sincerely believe Asra to be bad for you. I don't know if his affection is genuine or not, but I do know that he- and you- crossed a line tonight I thought was well-established. Maybe I'm blaming him in error. Maybe it was you. I don't know, and I don't care. What you did tonight was a mistake, and not only do you not care about the consequences, you did it even though I warned you of it.

I could have him arrested, Thomas. But I'm not going to do that. All that would do is make you hate me, and I don't want that. But you're also very obviously not going listen to me and put this on hold until he  _ can't _ be arrested for it. So this is what I'm going to do. You're half a year away from adulthood, and I've taught you everything I know. You're a talented fortune-teller, and you have complete knowledge of all the components we stock in the shop. It's yours. You think you're an adult now? Here's your chance to prove me wrong. It's yours. I'm going back to Seserach. You can send for me when you've realized that Asra is bad for you and that you're not the adult you think you are. 

But I hope I'm wrong.

I love you,

Aunt Saskia."

Asra was quiet and still, hands still tense on Thomas's shoulders. He took a deep, shuddering breath. Thomas cut off whatever he was about to say. "She abandoned me..."

"I'm so sorry." 

Asra sounded like he was going to cry. Thomas turned to face him, wrapping his arms around him. Asra returned the embrace, bringing one hand up to the back of Thomas's head and cradling it. They stood like that for several minutes, Thomas simply focusing on taking one breath, then another, feeling Asra's soothing heartbeat. Finally, he said, "Well, the plus side of this is that we don't have to go apartment-hunting."

Asra snorted and tightened his embrace. "Are you sure you want me to move in?"

"I'm sure. I don't want to live alone. Hell, we can invite Muriel if you want to."

"Muriel would look at me like I lost my mind," Asra chuckled. "Let me go talk to him... alone. I'm sorry. I'm afraid he'll react badly if you're there when I break the news to him that I'm leaving."

"So you will?"

Asra pulled away very slightly, only enough to look Thomas in the face. "Yes, of course," he said tenderly. "I meant it when I said I wanted to be with you. And I want to prove to you that I- well." His face flushed, and he looked away. "That I care about you."

"You don't have to prove anything to me," Thomas said, and leaned up to kiss him. "I know you care about me."

Asra smiled at him. "Will you be alright alone while I go talk to Muriel?" 

Thomas nodded, and pulled his keys from his bag and handed them to Asra. "Here. I don't know if Aunt Saskia left her keys. I'm going to lock the door behind you because- well- I don't want to open the shop right now, and I don't want anyone wandering in. I'll get you your own keys made tomorrow."

Asra took the keys, and nodded. "I'll be back before nightfall. I- take care, Thomas."

"You too."

With that, Asra left the shop, and Thomas locked the door behind him, then sagged against it. He counted at least twice in that conversation that Asra almost said 'I love you' and then stopped himself. Was it really that hard to say it to him? What was he doing wrong?

Then he straightened. It might not have been him at all. Asra had lived his life with only Muriel, having to look out for himself, not relying on anyone else. Showing that kind of vulnerability might've been harder for Asra than most. Either way, he already knew it, even if Asra had thought he was asleep when he said it, and he knew it with every caress and touch and tender word Asra spoke. He didn't need for Asra to declare it to know it.

Feeling better about it, Thomas went upstairs to the living area to see what state it was in. As he expected, the drawers Saskia used for her clothes were empty, but she had left all of their cookware and other items that he would need to carry out day-to-day life. That was a relief. He didn't know the first thing about cookware. 

A quick examination of their safe revealed that she had left him quite a bit of money, too. Of course, she had taken some of it to help her passage back to Sesarach, but she'd left most of it there. That made him feel marginally better. She hadn't up and left him with nothing. He wasn't sure at all he could believe her when she wrote that she loved him anymore, but she cared enough to not leave him struggling right out of the gate. He took a deep breath, closing the safe and looking around. He would be fine. They had regular customers at the shop, and now with Asra there, people who came to him for readings would come there. They would make this work.

His mind wandered to Muriel. That gave him pause. A lot of it. Would Muriel be alright on his own? 

He had almost talked himself out of this when he heard the door downstairs. “Thomas?” came Asra’s questioning voice.

“I’m up here,” Thomas called. 

He heard Asra’s footsteps on the stairs, and then he was in the room, a large backpack on his back. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,” he teased, letting the pack down by the door. “I missed you.”

“You were gone for three hours,” Thomas replied, grinning as Asra came over to the bed and sat down beside him. “I see you bought some stuff.”

“Mhm. That’s everything.”

“That’s it?”

“I didn’t exactly have the space to accumulate much stuff. There’s a change of clothes in there, a couple of books, and some spell components.”

Thomas regarded him thoughtfully. “Only one change of clothes?”

Asra blushed. “Only one, unfortunately.”

“Well, I know what we’re doing tonight.” Thomas stood, offering a hand to Asra.

He took it, and Thomas opened the safe again and took half of the money there. Asra watched him curiously, then asked, “What  _ are  _ we doing? What are you planning?”

“We’re going to the shopping district,” Thomas announced, closing the safe. “We’re going to get you some things and then we’ll go to that pub I wanted to bring you to last night.”

Asra’s face went red. “I, uh, that’s, that’s not necessary, really. I have enough. I’ve survived years with what I have, and-“

“Asra.” At the sound of his name, Asra stopped talking. Thomas reached out and caressed his cheek. “You’re not alone in the woods anymore. Let me spoil you a bit. It’s... it’s the least I could do to thank you for not making me face this alone.”

“My affection is free, Thomas.” He turned his head and kissed his palm. “You don’t have to buy me nice things. That’s not why I-“

“I know, but I want to. Please? It’ll make me feel better.”

Asra sighed. "Very well. I suppose not having to do laundry every other day will be nice. Are we going now?"

Thomas nodded, his face coloring. Asra pointedly ignored the blush as he handed Thomas the keys and they went back down the stairs. As they approached the door, Thomas said in a small, embarrassed voice, "So you know how to do laundry?"

"I had to learn. I mean, no one was going to do it for- you don't, do you?" Thomas shook his head, blush flaming up to his ears, and Asra chuckled. "I'll show you. We'll do it together."

"You- you don't think any less of me, do you?"

"Why in the world would I-"

"It's  _ laundry _ . I must seem so pampered to you."

"You do. That's not your fault. If it's anyone's fault, it's Saskia. And I know how to do it, so there's no problem here. Relax, Thomas. Nothing you can come up with is going to drive me away or make me think less of you."

Thomas's shoulders slumped. "I still feel like an idiot. I don't know how to do  _ laundry _ ."

Asra laughed and gave Thomas an affectionate squeeze to the back of the neck. "You're not an idiot. I promise you that much. I've encountered a few idiots in my life, and you don't even come close. Let's go to the shopping district."

The pair left the shop and headed out for the shopping district, talking and laughing. In minutes, Thomas had forgotten his embarrassment and conversed easily with Asra. Faust made an appearance once when they stopped on a bridge to watch fish flit here and there in the water. "No, Faust, you can't go swimming," Asra told the snake, amused. Then he laughed. "I mean, you can  _ try _ to ask him, but I doubt it'll work. He can't hear you, silly."

Thomas watched in amusement as Faust slid from Asra's arm to his own, and squeezed, tongue flicking. He scratched under her chin lightly and asked, "What is she asking me?"

"If she can go swimming."

"Asra already told you that you couldn't." Faust squeezed slightly harder, and Thomas chuckled. "Sorry, sweetheart." She flicked her tongue out, catching the tip of Thomas's nose, and then retreated back to Asra. "She's not upset at me, is she?"

"Upset? Noooo. No, she was just teasing me." Asra stroked her head and she flicked her tongue at his cheek and slithered back into his shirt. "Let's get going again. I'm starting to get hungry. The sooner we can eat the better."

"Do you want to go eat first?"

He shook his head. "No, it's fine. Let's go."

The conversation changed to teaching each other magic, distracting them both from their surroundings. Neither noticed that the crowd had thinned out until Thomas looked up, over the crest of a hill. He stopped and gasped as his eyes fell on the street before him. "What- what happened here?"

Asra followed his gaze, and his expression darkened. The street was flooded out. It would be passable, but neither of them wanted to pass it. A horrible stench rose from the water flooding the street. A few people ventured into the street, wearing tall boots and moving gingerly. "When did all this happen?" Asra muttered. 

Thomas swallowed hard, looking at Asra. "I don't know. Do you think Count Lucio already knows?"

Asra tensed at the sound of the Count's name. He shook his head slowly. "No. Lucio rarely leaves the palace except to bother me and Muriel, and we haven't seen him in weeks. He wouldn't hear from any of the people, either." He shoulders drooped. "He would hear me, though. We... we better go talk to him."

Thomas put a hand on his shoulder. "You go back to the shop and get something to eat. I'll go."

"He won't see you. It has to be me."

"Then we'll go together."

Asra gave him a grateful smile, nodded, and the two turned, urgency in their steps now. Their silence was tense; Thomas's hand sought out Asra's, and he interlaced their fingers and squeezed reassuringly.

It was nearly dark by the time they arrived at the palace. The guards at the gate recognized Asra; one of them looked at them curiously as he pushed open the gate. "Here to see Doctor Devorak, Asra?"

"No. The Count."

The guards looked at each other. It looked like Asra's dislike of Lucio was well known. "The chamberlain is probably in the kitchens right now, helping prepare dinner. If you're quick, you might be able to get in to see him before he sits down for supper."

"Right. Thanks, Bludmila." The pair went into the castle, and Asra moved through the halls as if he'd grown up there. 

He led him to the kitchen, where the chamberlain looked up from the chef's prep, recognition falling over his face. "Asra. We weren't expecting you. Is everything alright?"

"No. I need to talk to Count Lucio."

The chamberlain straightened, worry flitting across his features. "Can I tell him what this is regarding? Are  _ you _ alright?"

"I'm fine. It's- Thomas and I just came from the shopping district. It's flooded out with water and what smells like sewage."

The chamberlain paled. "That doesn't sound good at all. Wait here. I'll go see about getting you in to see him."

As the chamberlain left, the chef handed them both dinner rolls. "Here. You look hungry."

"Thanks, Hestion." Asra nibbled on his roll politely. Thomas almost laughed as Asra's expression changed, and he took a bite out of it. Asra saw Thomas's smile, hastily chewed, and swallowed. "What? I  _ am _ hungry. And these are great."

Thomas simply shook his head and took a bite from his roll. It was flaky and delicious, and Thomas had to stop himself from devouring it. He ate well, but that was the tastiest bread he'd ever had in his life.

In a few minutes, the chamberlain returned. He looked like he wanted to be far away. "Count Lucio and Countess Nadia have invited you to dine with them tonight. Both of you."

Asra made a face. "Actually, we had plans-"

"I'm sorry, I misspoke. Count Lucio has  _ ordered _ you to dine with them tonight."

Dark anger crossed Asra's face, but it smoothed out into cold indifference in a moment. The change almost frightened Thomas. "Very well. I guess that pub will have to wait for another night, Thomas."

"It's not going anywhere," Thomas murmured back, and the chamberlain escorted them to the dining room and seated them at the long table. Lucio and Nadia were nowhere to be seen. Thomas considered asking Asra if he wanted to sneak out, but noticed the chamberlain standing guard at the door. He dropped his voice to a whisper and asked, "Doesn't he trust you?"

"He trusts me just fine, but he knows me better than to leave when Lucio wants me here and I don't want to be." He sighed. "This happens every time I come to the palace on my own. The first time, the chamberlain brought me here and left, and I just showed myself out."

The chamberlain was listening. "Count Lucio was furious, Asra. Doctor Devorak and I had to convince him not to have palace guards go find you and drag you back."

"I remember that well. I heard about it next time we talked." 

At that moment, Lucio swept in from the other end of the room, Nadia right behind him. "Asra!" he greeted cheerfully. "Imagine my surprise when the chamberlain came by to tell me you were here! And your... little boyfriend, too." A delicate sneer flashed across Lucio's face, but was gone quickly enough that Thomas wondered if he'd really seen it. 

Asra and Thomas stood until Lucio and Nadia were seated before taking their seats again. "I'm not here on a social call," Asra replied, ice rimming his voice. "We were in town, and-"

"Yes, yes, the chamberlain told us." Lucio waved Asra's explanation away. "And it bothered you so badly that you'd risk coming here yourself to tell me? Why do you  _ care _ , you don't even live in the city!"

Asra bristled. "I am Vesuvian," he snapped. "I was born here. I might not have lived in within the city proper but this is still my home."

"Take it easy. I didn't mean anything by it." But Lucio perked up in interest. "Have lived? Past tense?"

Surprise flickered on Asra's face, and then he looked like he wanted to melt into the seat. Thomas guessed that he hadn't meant to reveal that. "I'm moving in with Thomas," he murmured, as if it pained him to say it.

Lucio's interest was fanned. "Oh? I had no idea things were so serious between you two. Where are you living?" At Asra's glare, Lucio raised his hands in a surrendering gesture. "In case I need you, Asra. You  _ are _ my magician."

"I'm not your  _ anything _ , Lucio," Asra snapped. 

"Fine, don't tell me." Lucio's interested gaze turned to Thomas. "But I really hadn't known you were serious about each other. I might just have to get to know him better now."

"Don't you dare," Asra growled.

"Must you always be so suspicious of me?"

"Yes! I shouldn't have brought him here!"

At this, Nadia cleared her throat. "You have nothing to worry about, Asra. I am aware that your relationship is... contentious... but I promise you I will intervene if anything negative comes from this discussion. I'm interested in it, as well. Your living conditions have been... less than ideal. I've been worried about you since I was made aware of them."

Asra's face flushed, less from anger this time and more from embarrassment. "I... well... It's a long story, but I'm living at Thomas's magic shop now."

"Thomas's?" Lucio perked again. "I thought you said it was his aunt's."

"It was," Thomas spoke up. "She went home and left it to me."

"Isn't that nice for you, Asra." He grinned wolfishly. "But aren't you a little young to run the shop yourself?"

Smoothly, Thomas said, "I am. Asra's not."

"Fortuitous. I'll drink to that." He raised his glass and drank deeply. "What of your big friend, what's his name- Muriel?"

Asra bristled again. "Lucio-"

"I am  _ just _ asking, Asra. I know you two are close- or you used to be."

"He's... still where we were before." Asra looked like he wanted to bolt, rather than answer anymore of Lucio's questions.

"Mmm... jumping at the first opportunity to abandon him, eh?"

"I-!" Asra looked stricken, and Nadia cleared her throat again. " _ Lucio _ . I cannot believe I need to say this, but  _ be nice _ . Did you invite them to dinner just to needle at him?"

"None of you are any fun." Lucio's gaze turned back to Thomas, unquenchable interest in his eyes. "I don't think you ever told me how you met," he said mildly. "My questions are obviously rubbing Asra the wrong way- I wonder, are you as prickly as he is?"

Unsure, Thomas shot a glance at Asra. He still hadn't recovered from being accused of abandoning Muriel; Thomas would find no guidance with Asra. "Yes, well..." He cleared his throat. "It was a... a funny thing, actually. He set up shop outside mine and my aunt told me that I could go to the Masquerade if I got him to go away. I told him what she said and he went away."

Lucio gave a toothy smile. "Obviously he came back."

"Eventually. To talk to me."

"And the rest is history, as they say." Lucio gave him a charming smile. Thomas forced himself to remember what Asra told him about Lucio. This man was dangerous. He didn't want to reveal too much.

By then, Asra had taken a deep drink from his wine glass and had recovered. "About the shopping district?" he interjected, the icy shield back in his countenance.

"Yes. The shopping district." Lucio made a face. "It is a problem, isn't it. I knew about it when it happened, of course."

"What are you going to do about it?"

Lucio waved a hand dismissively. "I've asked my courtiers to come up with something. They'll get to it in due time. We have many pressing matters here at the palace. You understand." Thomas could tell by Asra's clenched jaw that he understood as well as Thomas did- Lucio didn't plan to do anything about this. "I noticed you didn't come to the party last night. Why not?"

"We weren't feeling up to it."

"I see. That's a shame. I was so looking forward to seeing you." He paused, gauging Asra's reaction. When Asra's stony expression didn't change, his grin turned vicious. " _ Ilya _ was so looking forward to seeing you."

Lucio smiled viciously when Asra went pale, gaze darting to Thomas and back. " _ Lucio _ ," Nadia said, exasperated. "Stop needling him!"

"What? I've said nothing but the truth. Jules  _ was _ disappointed he didn't get to see him." Whatever Lucio had wanted to do by bringing up the doctor, he obviously felt that he had accomplished it. He sat back, twisting his wine glass in his alchemical hand, watching Asra in morbid curiosity.

Thomas felt like he was missing something he really needed to understand. He wasn't going to bring it up in front of Lucio, however. He could tell from their expressions that Lucio had meant to hurt Asra, and he had succeeded. He wasn't going to risk deepening that hurt. But they still had an entire dinner to get through. Determined to be a buffer between Asra and Lucio now, Thomas asked coolly, "So. I take it the Masquerade was a success?"

"It's always a success," Lucio sniffed.

"Is there going to be a theme next year?"

The question took Lucio by surprise. "I hadn't thought about it yet, but- yes. Yes, a theme would be wonderful fun. Wouldn't it, Noddy?"

Thomas very carefully kept Lucio's attention on him while Asra regained his composure. A quick glance at him at one point showed Asra's gratitude as he ate silently, listening intently, tensely, ready to intervene at the first question Asra didn't like. 

Fortunately, with Lucio’s attention on Thomas, he left Asra alone. They didn’t finish dinner until late, and though Nadia invited them to stay the night, Asra hastily declined. Much to his apparent relief, Lucio didn’t push, and they were even able to take a carriage back to the shop.

They discarded their bags on the floor of the living area and tumbled into bed together, exhausted. They rested in each other’s arms, not moving, just breathing.

Finally, Thomas stirred. “We still need to get you new clothes. Let’s try the fashion district. It’ll be a bit pricier than at the shopping district, but it should still be doable. And we’ll go to that pub tomorrow if it kills me.”

“Please don’t let it kill you.” Asra leaned in for a kiss. He meant it to be chaste, just a peck on the lips, but Thomas chased him when he pulled away, kissing him harder and more insistently. Asra leaned into him until their kisses were hungry, open-mouthed and desperate. He didn’t resist Thomas as he pulled him on top of him, his body resting between his legs. Asra did break the kiss, however, to gasp out, “Are you sure?”

“Yes. I need you. Asra. Please-“

Asra silenced him with another kiss, fierce and passionate.


	5. Chapter 5

Days passed, and Lucio did nothing about the flooded district. Asra went up to the palace once more, alone, without telling Thomas his plans. He returned late that night to a nearly frantic lover; Thomas barely held back tears as he pulled him into a tight, shaking embrace. “I thought something happened to you!” Thomas cried.

“I’m... I’m fine. I just went to talk to Lucio about-“

“Alone? Don’t do that again, Asra, please. What was I supposed to do if he decided to hold you there against your will?”

Asra murmured that that would never happen as he soothingly stroked Thomas’s hair. Regardless, Thomas extracted the promise not to go to the palace alone again. “You don’t have to worry about that. He’s not going to listen. I’m not going to keep wasting my breath trying to get him to.”

"Thank you," Thomas replied, kissing him hard, almost possessive. Asra kissed back, continuing to murmur reassurances that he was alright.

Other than that one night, their lives fell into an easy routine, one that both of them were content to carry out. There were bumps in the road; Asra was careless with his belongings, leaving them wherever he dropped them and frequently forgetting about them; and Thomas got upset whenever their routine was disrupted, regardless of how minor the disruption was.

And then there were Asra’s trips.

The first time Asra left, Thomas was okay with it. He was just going away for a few days, to Nopal; there were some spell components that were easier to obtain there than in Vesuvia. A few days turned into nearly a week, sparking a fierce fight between them when he finally returned. “You’re not my keeper, Thomas!” Asra had yelled at the apex of the fight.

“I’m not trying to be! You told me you’d be back in a couple of days! It’s been a week! I was  _ worried _ about you! How was I supposed to know that you were alright?”

“By trusting me to take care of myself, maybe? I survived twenty-one years without your concern, I can survive without you hovering over me.”

“Is that what you think I’m doing?” Then Thomas threw up his hands. “You know what? I need to take a walk.”

“Thomas-“ Thomas ignored him, storming out the door as Asra snapped his name again.

Both of them were calm by the time Thomas came back, and both of them remorseful. Asra sat in the back room, hands folded on the table, when the door opened. He rose and went out into the shop proper. As Thomas opened his mouth to speak, Asra said hurriedly, “You’re right. I’m sorry. I stayed for a festival in Nopal but I should have come home, or at least found a way to tell you I’d be away for a few more days.”

“I’m sorry too,” Thomas replied softly. “You absolutely should have found a way to tell me, but I overreacted. You’re home safe; that’s all that matters.”

Asra gave a hesitant, hopeful smile. “Are we okay?”

“We’re okay.” He crossed the room and swept Asra up into his arms. Asra embraced him, burying his face in Thomas’s shoulder and breathing deeply. After a moment, Asra turned his head to kiss Thomas’s neck, softly at first, then suggestively. Thomas laughed softly, burying his fingers in Asra’s hair and tilting his head back to give him better access. “You have a one-track mind,” he informed him in dry affection.

“And you love it,” Asra murmured against his neck.

“No argument there.”

* * *

Life continued. Thomas was happy, happier than he could ever remember being. Asra never said that he loved him again, but hearing it once was enough. Asra showed him his love every day, in the way he acted and the gentle tones when he spoke. Aunt Saskia had always said that actions spoke louder than words, and Thomas never understood that saying before Asra came into his life.

One day brought about a strange role reversal, with Asra watching the shop and Thomas running errands. Asra had woken feeling a little under the weather, leading Thomas to suggest that they take on each other’s duties that day.

Thomas had just gotten Asra’s favorite pumpkin bread from the marketplace- it wasn’t on his list of things to do, but Asra would appreciate it- and was approaching the south end for the rest of the supplies on his list, when he saw her. The child sat on the edge of the street, wrapped in a blanket, giving off sickly, weak coughs every few seconds. Thomas watched her in pity for several seconds, debating approaching her. He was skilled in healing magic; perhaps he could help her. 

As a cough doubled her over, Thomas changed the direction he was walking, intending to do so. As he approached, the girl looked up, and Thomas’s stomach twisted in shock and fear. The scleras of the girl’s eyes were more than bloodshot- they were blood red, none of the whites showing. She looked up at him dully, looking so sick, too sick to care if he was a bad stranger or good stranger.

He approached carefully, kneeling in front of her and setting his bags down. "I'm not going to hurt you," he said soothingly. She closed her bloody eyes, and he asked, "What hurts worst? I can ease it for a little bit, at least."

"My head," the child whimpered.

Thomas hesitated to touch the girl, but he did reach out, his hands hovering over her scalp, focusing his magic. He could  _ see _ her pain in his magic, and he gently, very gently, blanketed that red-hot pain with soothing coolness. The child sighed in relief, but didn't open her eyes. "Thank you," she whispered. 

"You're welcome. I'm sorry I can't do more for you."

She said nothing else. He gathered up his bags and rushed the rest of the way through the south end. That girl wasn't the only one he saw with red eyes; he saw several more people, all of them with the same glassy-eyed, pained exhaustion. Thomas didn't stop to help anyone else. If he did, he'd have been there for hours, and Asra was expecting him back soon. Now that he'd seen this- whatever it was- he was intensely worried about Asra.

He rushed home after that, mind on one thing: making sure Asra was alright. He burst into the shop and went right to Asra as he looked up. "Thomas?" Asra murmured, as Thomas took his face in his hands and stared intently into his eyes. "What's- what's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost." Thomas shook his head, kissing Asra deeply when he confirmed that there was no red in Asra's eyes. When he pulled away, Asra was blushing. "You're going to get my cold if you keep that up."

"I don't care." Thomas withdrew, looking away and to his bags. He pulled out the pumpkin bread and handed it to Asra, who immediately brightened. "There's something going on in the South End," he told him, as Asra unwrapped the bread and pulled a chunk off. "People are sick."

"Outbreaks aren't uncommon in the South End," Asra observed. "Might explain my cold."

Thomas gave him a strange look as he popped a bit of bread in his mouth. "When have you been in the South End recently?" When Asra simply shrugged, Thomas continued, "But this is more than just a cold. People's eyes are red."

"Bloodshot? That's not so unusual for-"

"Not bloodshot.  _ Red _ . The entire whites of their eyes are solidly blood red."

Asra hastily chewed and swallowed. "That doesn't sound good. Maybe we should avoid the South End until whatever that is has blown over. Hopefully you didn't get it."

"I hope not, either. The people who have it look utterly miserable."

"Thank you for the bread. You didn't have to."

"The bread was calling to me. Whispering, 'Get me for Asra. Make him feel better, poor little fox.'"

Asra laughed, handing Thomas a chunk of the bread. "Now that you're home, though, I think I'm going to go back upstairs and try to sleep this off, if you don't mind."

"I don't mind at all." Thomas kissed him. "Rest well."

* * *

News of the first deaths trickled through the neighborhood, spurring frightened people calling on the young magicians to provide some kind of warning against the illness. Asra and Thomas tried to explain that that wasn’t how magic worked; that the best defense against an outbreak was good hygiene; but few listened to them. Thomas ended up blessing several homes and businesses.

Asra was not amused. “You know when the outbreak reaches this neighborhood, people are going to call you a charlatan when it doesn’t protect them, right?”

“I made them acknowledge that the blessing won’t take the place of good hygiene practices,” Thomas told him. “Besides, I heard some more information about it.”

“What’s that?”

The households struck hardest by the illness were infested with red beetles.”

Asra frowned, thinking hard. “I don’t think any of the beetles endemic to Vesuvia are red. Where did they come from?”

“I don’t know, but the current rumor is that they’re supernatural. If that’s the case...”

“The blessings could keep them out,” Asra murmured. Then he sighed. “I’ve got a really bad feeling about this whole situation. Something about it is  _ very  _ wrong. I just wish I could pinpoint  _ what _ .”

Thomas leaned on the shop counter, chin propped in his hands. “Help me bless the shop?”

Asra gave a little smile. “If it would make you feel better,” he said, and kissed Thomas’s forehead.

Days passed; the outbreak grew worse by the day. People languished for weeks before dying, at first, but as it progressed, people died faster and faster. The illness never broached their neighborhood, but Asra and Thomas watched the gossip of the marketplace in grim fear, until one day, Asra changed course when they were together on errands. The shop was closed for the week; both of them needed a break. 

“Where are we going?” Thomas asked as Asra pulled him along.

“The palace.” Asra’s voice was grim. “I’m going to confront Lucio about this. I don’t know if he’s even aware that the city’s started to die around us, but he  _ will  _ know when I’m through with him.”

Thomas knew better than to protest. At best, Asra would send him home and go into Lucio’s domain alone. He quickened his pace to keep up with Asra’s purposeful stride.

Everything was quiet when they arrived. The chamberlain showed them to a salon, where they sat together in tense silence. Thomas tried to think of something to say, anything, to break the silence. Nothing meaningful came to him. He was about to ask about dinner when Lucio pushes the salon doors open, Doctor Devorak hot on his heels. “Asra! A delight to see you! What brings you here, hm?”

“There’s a plague in the city,” Asra said flatly. “Are you even aware of it? It’s killing more people every day.”

“Mm. Acutely aware of it,” Lucio replied smoothly. “Why do you care? There haven’t been any reports of it in your area yet. Or are you here to do that?”

Asra shook his head. “ _ People are dying _ , Lucio. That’s why I care.”

Lucio heaved a deep sigh and turned away, flicking his fingers in their direction. “Educate them, Jules.”

It was the first time Thomas had seen the doctor without a mask. He was quite handsome, the thought to himself. Didn’t hold a candle to Asra, but Thomas imagined that he had no trouble finding lovers when the desire for one struck. Doctor Devorak cleared his throat. “Uh, yes, it’s- it’s as count Lucio says. I’m aware of the plague- that is,  _ we _ are aware of it- and he’s got me and Quaestor Valdemar working on it.” He paused, then added hopefully, “We believe it’s magical in origin. We could really use the help of a magician or two.”

Before even Thomas knew what he was saying, it was out of his mouth. “I’ll help.”

Everyone turned to him. Doctor Devorak’s eyes lit up for a moment. “You, uh, you will?”

“You will?” Asra repeated flatly.

“Uh oh.” Lucio took a seat across from them, chin in a hand, morbid interest in his eyes. “I know that tone, Thomas. I’d take that back if I were you.”

Asra scowled. “Stay out of this, Lucio. Thomas, you’re not a doctor. You’re a magician.”

“He said he could use a magician’s help.” Thomas shrugged. “I’ve... always wanted to learn more healing than I do.”

“I’m useless for healing  _ magic _ , but I can help you if you want to learn medicine,” Doctor Devorak said kindly. 

“I’ll take what I can get.”

The doctor’s gaze flicked hopefully to Asra. “What about you?”

Asra met Doctor Devorak’s gaze and held it. Thomas could see a deep hope in his eyes, and an unfamiliar tension in Asra’s. Asra was the first to look away, shaking his head. “No. Someone’s got to watch the shop.”

Hesitantly, Thomas said, “You’re right. That should be me. You’re much more powerful than I am.”

Asra gave a short laugh, shaking his head and slinging an arm around Thomas’s shoulders. “I don’t know if you did it intentionally, but you know better than to lie like that,” Asra said in a teasing voice. Thomas turned his attention to Asra, but not before seeing Doctor Devorak look away. He thought he saw him flinch, very slightly. “I’m not lying,” he said firmly. “In terms of raw power, you-“

“We’re not talking about raw power, we’re talking about skill. And you’re far more skilled than I am.”

“Then you don’t have a problem with it?”

“You want to help people. How could I have a problem with that?” Asra kissed him tenderly.

Lucio was delighted. “How did you  _ do  _ that, Thomas? I’ve seen Asra that angry before and he didn’t speak to me for  _ months _ . What’s your secret?”

“His secret is not being a despicable human being,” Asra muttered.

Now Lucio was amused. “You know you’re the only one I’d ever let speak to me like that.”

“What about Nadi?” Asra challenged.

Lucio shrugged. “Her too. So are you going to help us or not?”

“I’ll help Thomas by watching the shop,” Asra replied coolly. 

“Good enough,” Lucio shrugged. “I’m going to go relax. You don’t need me to be here and I’ve got better things to do. He’s all yours, Jules.”

With that, Lucio stood and swaggered out of the room. They watched him go, before Doctor Devorak turned his attention back to them. He went to sit where Lucio had been. “Right, first things first. My name is Ilya, or Julian if that’s too hard for you to pronounce. I’m not ‘Doctor Devorak’ to anyone but patients and I’m certainly not ‘Jules’. Only Lucio gets away with calling me that.”

“You must be close with him,” Thomas murmured.

Asra snorted, and Ilya shot him a grin. “We hate each other, actually. He does it to annoy me. What’s your knowledge of folk remedies like?”

The question took Thomas by surprise. Before Thomas could recover, Asra answered, “He knows at least as much as I do. I’m not going to say he  _ only _ knows as much as I do, though.”

“That’s a significant amount. It’ll do to get us started.” A hesitant hope crossed Ilya’s face. “Are you sure you don’t want to join us, Asra?”

“I’m sure.” Thomas got the sense that there was something more to Asra’s refusal, but he wasn’t going to ask him in front of Ilya. 

“... very well, then.” Julian didn’t press him further. “It’s a solid base to start with, anyway. Report to my clinic in the city tomorrow, and we’ll begin. You’re always welcome to join us, Asra.”

“Thanks, but no thanks.”

“As you wish.” Ilya glanced at the door, then dropped his voice. “Thank you for coming here, Asra. He actually cares what your opinion is. He might start taking this more seriously now. I doubt it, but it’s possible.”

“He doesn’t care what my opinion is,” Asra replied bitterly. “I won’t do as he says unless he listens to me. That’s the only reason he does.”

“I’m not so sure about that. He hasn’t bothered you since you moved in with Thomas, right? He knows you’ve got a good life now, so-“

Through clenched teeth, Asra snarled, “He murdered my parents, Ilya.”

Thomas gasped; Asra’s utter hatred for the man suddenly made horrible, terrible sense. Ilya’s face drained of color. “How- how do you know?”

“He told me. One day his threats weren’t enough to get me to do his bidding, so he threatened Muriel, and pointed to their murder as proof that he could do it.”

Ilya’s face darkened with simmering rage, and then smoothed over. “He didn’t tell me any of this. I’m so sorry, Asra.”

Asra took a deep, steadying breath. “It’s been a long time. If I could cut him out of my life completely, I would.” He put a hand to his face, shoulders slumping. “I’m just glad he hasn’t threatened Thomas yet. I’m afraid of what I’ll do if he does.”

Ilya grimaced. “Nadia and I have been working on him. He’s never going to be a  _ good  _ person but I’d like to think he’s a better person than he was before Nadia came here. If he bothers you or threatens Thomas, tell her.”

“I will. That might be why he’s been behaving, after all. I’ll have to thank her.” He sighed. “I don’t like you exposing yourself to this illness, Thomas, but as long as it’s something you want to do, I’m okay with it.”

“Thank you.” He leaned in and kissed him gently. Then he looked back to Ilya. “I need to know where your clinic is.”

“I’ll draw you a map.” Ilya pulled a writing kit from his pocket and quickly scribbled a diagram on it, then handed it to Thomas. He was shocked to find the diagram itself surprisingly legible; the street names, not so much. 

“What’s this street here supposed to be?”

“Aredel.”

“I know where that is. It’s right around the corner from my shop. I should be able to find it without a problem.”

Ilya gave him a soft smile. “Good. I will see you there tomorrow. Could you, uh, give me a minute or two with Asra?”

Asra tensed, visibly. But when Thomas looked at him questioningly, he nodded. "It's fine. I'll be right out."

Thomas kissed him again, and stood and left the room, closing the door behind him. He lingered by it, torn. On the one hand, he wanted to know what that weird tension between Asra and Ilya was; on the other, Ilya clearly didn't want him to be aware of what was said. Curiosity won out, and he put an ear to the door. "... Just want to know if he makes you happy."

"He does. I'm the happiest I've ever been. He's my world. I- I love him."

Thomas closed his eyes. Why wouldn't he say it to  _ him? _ "Good. That's- that's good. Don't let him go. He's good for you, I can tell."

"... thanks, Ilya."

Thomas hastily pulled away from the door, walking to the other side of the hallway and peering up at the painting there. It was of Count Lucio, posed with a sword pointing at a monstrous form. Asra exited the salon. "Admiring the artwork?" he said teasingly, coming up behind him and sliding his arms around his waist.

"He certainly thinks highly of himself, doesn't he?" Thomas murmured, leaning back against him. 

"No one ever accused Lucio of being too humble. Come on, let's go home. I have  _ plans _ for tonight."

"Oh? What manner of plans?"

They started walking, arm in arm. "Something I think you'll really, really enjoy. I know I will."

* * *

The days wore on. The plague got worse. Thomas worked closely by Julian to learn everything he could, which was quite a lot. Apparently this plague had been seen in other major cities, and Julian had come with Lucio to Vesuvia as his personal physician, but Julian's teacher had discovered the plague and had taught him how to treat the symptoms- although there was no cure. People died within days of contracting it, surviving no more than a week.

Soon, the south end and flooded districts were filled with dead bodies. Thomas went into the South End to assess how bad it was, and actually used his plague mask to do it. He hated the thing, but he hadn't had a choice. The stench was overpowering, even through the herbs stuffed in the beak of the mask. 

Thomas took his findings directly to Lucio and Nadia at the palace. Lucio muttered darkly when he described conditions in the city. "I don't want to deal with this," he hissed, pacing. "Jules!"

"Ah- yes?"

"Haven't you gotten that cure yet?!"

Julian's face flushed. "We're working on it. Oh, are we working on it. We have twenty doctors now. It just... doesn't seem  _ natural _ . Nothing that  _ should  _ help actually is. We can treat the symptoms, but-"

Lucio cut him off with a wave of his hand. "Yes, yes. We need to do something with everyone who's sick. There are a few uninhabited islands off the coast, aren't there? I'll have my architects pick one and build a facility. Hopefully that'll stop the spread of the disease. I'm getting tired of getting complaints about the conditions in the city. Ship 'em off somewhere else and they'll be out of our hair."

Thomas and Julian looked at each other, Julian's expression resigned, Thomas's disgusted. "Very well," Julian said tiredly, "but they'll have to build quickly. This is getting out of control very fast."

"Oh, they'll build quickly. I know how to motivate people."

Lucio's phrasing made Thomas feel sick. He said nothing, though, as Lucio dismissed them with a wave of his hand, and the two of them filed out of the salon they'd met him in. Julian ran a hand down his face. "Go home, Thomas," he said quietly, "and get some rest. You look like you haven't slept in days."

"I feel like I haven't slept in days," Thomas replied wearily. "Asra is... uncomfortable with us being here. He wants to leave. I've convinced him that with the number of doctors working on this cure, we'll have it in a matter of weeks, but I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to keep him here."

Julian sighed. "You'll be missed, if you go."

Thomas shook his head. "No. If he goes, he goes alone," he said firmly, pain in his voice. "I don't want him to, but I won't abandon a city full of people who need help, when I can help them."

Julian looked almost pained when Thomas said that. "Are you sure about that? He... he adores you, Thomas. Making him leave alone will hurt him badly."

"Leaving me behind to face this alone will hurt  _ me _ ," Thomas retorted. "He knows I'm determined to see this through. If he leaves knowing how important it is to me... well. That will speak volumes to me about our relationship."

"Thomas... he might be right. The death toll yesterday breached a hundred. For the  _ day _ . We can't bury everyone who dies on at the Lazaret. Lucio's ordered his architects to add a crematorium to it because it's the fastest way to dispose of the bodies. Things are getting out of control, very fast. If Asra wants to leave, I don't blame him- and I think you'd be making a mistake if you didn't go with him."

Thomas shook his head stubbornly. "No. I'm staying. If... If he wants to go, I'll let him." He seemed to deflate as he thought. "To be honest, it will hurt, but I'd feel better knowing he's out of danger. But I  _ can't _ just leave, Ilya. I can't explain it. I just feel like I  _ need _ to be here."

"I'm not going to send you away. You're a grown adult, you can make decisions for yourself. But at least think about what I said." He sighed. "Go home and rest. The dying aren't going anywhere anytime soon."

Nodding, Thomas said, "I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow."

Thomas could feel Julian's eyes on his back as he walked away, his mind in turmoil. He didn't want to face this darkness alone, but Asra was his own person, and he was scared. Knowing how frightened Asra was tore him apart, but Asra didn't seem to understand how Thomas could be  _ not _ scared, how Thomas could  _ want _ to stay. He wasn't going to rest when he got home, he knew that much. They needed to have a talk. He had to find a way to get it through to Asra that he was going to be okay. The plague hadn't reached their neighborhood, and the blessings that they had done for people in their neighborhood seemed to be keeping the beetles out. They had figured out that the beetles were the carriers of the plague, and as long as they kept the beetles out, they were safe.

He was still mulling over whether or not he wanted to encourage Asra to leave or not when he arrived back at the shop. He opened the door and shouted, “Asra! I’m home!”

As Thomas expected, Asra came down the stairs. He wasn’t prepared for how Asra was dressed for traveling. “Good. We’re leaving. Now.”

His tone left no room for argument, and Thomas was taken aback by it. Asra had never spoken to him like that. “We’ve been over this,” Thomas said defensively. “I  _ can’t  _ leave! I-“

“Thomas,  _ we’ll die _ if we don’t leave!”

“The blessings-“

_ “Aren’t working anymore!” _ Anything else Thomas was about to say was shocked into silence. Asra had never raised his voice to him like that. Fear vibrated in every word. “Elisa Teneri is sick, Thomas! This neighborhood isn’t safe anymore!”

Asra’s words shocked through him. Elisa lived just two streets over from them. “The blessings must be losing power. We need to-“

“We need to go, Thomas, please, I am  _ begging you- _ “

“I  _ can’t, _ Asra, people are depending on me-“

“I’m depending on you! Don’t make me go alone, please. We need to go. We need to get out of here before it starts spreading here, too!”

“Is anyone else fleeing?” Thomas asked with raised eyebrows.

Asra ticked off several family names before finishing up with, “And us. Thomas- no-  _ listen _ \- you’re just an apprentice! They’re not going to be losing anything critical if you-“

_ “Asra, _ ” Thomas cut him off, hurt.

Asra heard it in his voice and flushed, lowering his own. “I didn’t mean it like that, but it’s the truth. You’re administering medicine right now and nothing else. Anyone at the clinic can do that. Your life is too precious to-“

“No.” Thomas’s voice was firm, with a heavy note of finality. “You can go. Ilya is paying me enough to maintain the shop without actually running it. Write to me when you get to wherever you’re going, and I’ll let you know when Vesuvia is safe again.”

Asra’s eyes flooded with tears. “No,” he whispered. “Tommy, please-“

Thomas turned away abruptly, anger rising in him. Asra never used the diminutive of his name. That had been a guilt trip. “Go.”

Neither spoke or moved for several seconds. Then Asra brushed past him to the door, wordlessly. Thomas watched his back for a second as he opened the door. A sudden impulse gripped him; he had the awful feeling that he was never going to see him again. He blurted out, “Asra, I love you.”

Asra stopped in the doorway, turning his head ever so slightly. He didn't turn enough for Thomas to see his face. "I-" Thomas held his breath, waiting for Asra to find his words. "I'll write to you when I get to Nopal," he said finally, looking forward again, shoulders slumping. "Be careful. Please be careful."

Without waiting for a response, Asra stepped out of the doorway and into the street, closing the door behind himself. Thomas stared at the door for several minutes, his heart pounding, resisting the urge to run after him. He swallowed back tears, and then locked the door behind Asra, turned the shop sign to read "closed", and trudged upstairs. The living space felt painfully empty. Thomas collapsed onto the bed, far too big for only one person. He gathered up Asra's pillow and buried his face in it, muffling his cries with it. He cried until he was too exhausted to do anything but sleep.

The next day, when Thomas reported for duty, Julian noticed immediately that something wasn't right. Thomas was exhausted, and it was like someone had suffocated his spirit. He didn't smile when he greeted his coworkers, barely spoke to anyone. Julian's heart sank as he watched, and pulled Thomas aside. "What's wrong? You're not yourself today."

"He left me." The words were soft, dull,  _ dead _ .

Julian murmured something in sympathy. "Do you need some time off?"

He shook his head. "No. I need to stay distracted."

Julian searched his face and eyes, concerned. "I need an assistant for the day," he announced. "Congratulations, you've got the job."

"You don't actually need an assistant, do you?"

"You'll never know."

Thomas sighed and nodded, putting the medicines he was pulling off the shelf back on them. "Lead on, Doctor Devorak."

"Watch it." Julian gave him a sympathetic smile, and the two of them started their day.

By the middle of it, they were on their way to the palace to give Lucio and Nadia their report. Julian mentioned that he wanted to do some independent research, and that he'd have a job for Thomas when they got there. Lucio and Nadia met them in the library. As soon as Lucio's gaze fell on Thomas, he made a face. "Don't you look cheerful."

"Lucio," Julian said warningly. 

"I'm just saying. He looks like someone pissed in his breakfast."

"Lucio!" Nadia snapped.

Lucio shot her a grin, then turned his attention back to Thomas. "Well? What the hell's wrong with you?"

Thomas resisted the urge to snap at him to mind his own business. "Asra left."

"Asra... left? What, did you break up?"

"I... I don't know. I don't know. I told him that I love him when he left and he just said he'd write to me when he got to Nopal."

Lucio cursed. "He  _ left _ left. That  _ coward _ . Say the word and I'll have him brought back, Thomas."

"No!" Thomas gasped, eyes going wide. "No, no, don't- he'd never forgive me if-"

Much to Thomas's surprise, Lucio's expression softened. "Suit yourself," he said, and although his tone was his usual swaggart, there was an undercurrent of sympathy that Thomas didn't think he was capable of. "Down to business. That cure, Jules. Where is it?"

"We don't have it yet," Julian answered. "I want to do some research and maybe some experiments with Thomas today."

Lucio's grin turned cruel. "Oh? Babysitting him, are we?"

"He doesn't need to be babysat," Julian replied sourly, "but I do need a magician to do these experiments."

Lucio held up his hands in a surrendering gesture. "Fine, fine. No need to get defensive. Just make sure Valdemar knows your plans.”

Julian went pale. “They- they know I want to perform these experiments,” he stuttered. “There’s no need to bother them to let them know I’ve got the assistance I need.”

“Jules, they aren’t going to bite you.”

“You’d think that,” Julian replied dryly. Then he turned to Thomas. “Let’s go to the library and get started.”


	6. Chapter 6

Asra sighed, approaching the tiny house he had bartered from an elderly lady in Nopal for. She was nearing the end of her life, and had no heirs; she would never use this place again, and Asra offered to care for her in return for use of it. After a few months of this, she had declared that his assistance had paid for it, and given him the deed to it. The day that happened, Asra considered writing to Thomas, asking him again to come to Nopal- if only to visit. He decided against it. They had continued their argument into the letters they sent each other, and now Asra dreaded hearing from him. He hated it. He loved Thomas so much, but they were so, so angry with each other, they couldn't seem to get past it. 

But it had been a while since he'd gotten a letter from Thomas. A month, at least. Thomas had never taken so long to get back to him, even if Asra had said something that really pissed him off. And his last letter had been mild. He had extended an olive branch; he was tired of fighting. Asra wanted him there, with him in Nopal, where he was safe, but the fact of the matter was that Thomas wasn't coming, and Asra had to live with that. What could Asra have possibly said to anger Thomas enough that it would take him this long to write back?

His gaze locked on an envelope laying on the front step of the house, and Asra's heart jumped. He rushed forward, snatching it up, and then stopped in shock as he read the address. This... this wasn't Thomas's handwriting.

It was Ilya's.

Asra held the envelope in trembling fingers. Raw, cold dread ran down his back as he ripped the envelope open and began to read. At first, he wished he wasn’t familiar with Ilya’s handwriting, that he couldn’t read it.

But he could. 

The page fell from numb fingers as he stared straight down at where the page had just been, his heart thudding in his chest like it would pound right out of it. After a minute, his body moved as if on autopilot, bolting for the desert, screaming for the beast at the top of his voice.

It was enough to rouse the creature from its sleep.  _ Asra? What is wrong? _

“Thomas,” he gasped, choking on tears. “Thomas has the plague. I have to- I have to get to him. Now.  _ Now! _ ”

_ I will bring you to him. Hop on, quickly now. _

Asra didn’t need to be told twice. He clambered up onto the beast’s back and sank his fingers into its fur. It turned, and bolted across the desert.

Asra hurled invectives at himself the entire journey to Vesuvia. The beast told him once to rest; Asra closed his eyes, and immediately snapped them open. He saw Thomas when he closed his eyes, scleras red, feverish,  _ suffering _ .

This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t  _ be  _ happening. This was Ilya’s sick idea of a joke- this was Thomas’s revenge for abandoning him- this was- this was-

This was neither of those things. Neither of them would terrify him like this. But it still wasn’t happening. Thomas had written in his last letter that Julian thought he was close to a breakthrough. The cure was right there, it was ready to be deployed, it  _ had to be _ , they would find it in time, they  _ had to. _

Asra barely had the presence of mind to thank the beast when they reached the edge of Vesuvia. It had brought him closer, much closer than it was comfortable with. Asra murmured gratitude to the beast before taking off running through the woods. He briefly thought about stopping to get Muriel, but no- he was racing against time now. There was no telling how long Thomas would last. He had to do something. Maybe his magic was strong enough to stave off death long enough for the cure to be completed, but he had to do something. He  _ had to do something _ !

His lungs and legs ached by the time he got to the city, but he only slowed his pace; he didn't stop. He made his way to the docks. Dozens of boats dotted the waters, most of them full of sick people; the ones that weren't were returning to collect others. Asra set upon one of the empty boats, approaching the owner at a quick pace. "Excuse me," he said, breathless, "but I need to get to the Lazaret. Lend me your boat. Please."

The man looked at him like he'd lost his mind. "You want to go to the Lazaret? Why? You're healthy."

"I'm looking for someone."

A look of pity crossed his features. "I- I see. I'm sorry, but I need to be able to ferry the sick-"

"Please! Please, I'm desperate!" The gondolier watched helplessly as Asra wrung his hands, watching him with anxiety etched in his face. " _ Please _ ," Asra whispered emphatically. "I have to get to him!"

That broke the man. He stepped out of the boat, gesturing for Asra to take his place. "Bring it back as soon as you've found him, lad," he said softly. "Good luck."

Asra almost fell in the water in his haste to get in the boat. He dipped his fingers into the water, and the boat sped off into the sea, heading for the lazaret. 

The trip seemed to take hours, even though it was only fifteen minutes, at best. As the boat beached, Asra leapt out of it, heading straight into the building. A man in a plague mask tried to stop him. "Sir, you can't-"

He didn't even think to protest other than, "I have to! My lover is-"

"I'm sorry, but if they're here, there's nothing you can-"

"Let me through!" Asra snapped, summoning his magic. The air around him crackled and his hair stood on end. Alarmed, the man stood aside, and Asra pushed through into the building. The smell of death assaulted his senses; it was deathly quiet except for a few coughs every few seconds, and the crackling of the fire in the crematorium. His eyes scanned the rows and rows of beds, most of them occupied with people, some of them with their blankets pulled over their heads. How was he supposed to find Thomas in all of this?

The thought struck him like a bolt of lightning. His compass! He hadn't used it in years, and dug it out of his bag now. The needle spun wildly, and then pointed across the room, towards the door on the opposite side. Asra didn't hesitate for a moment, striding quickly through the rows of beds. Several plague doctors looked over at him; none of them dared try to stop him. He burst out onto the beach, staring down at the needle. A sick feeling swept over him; there were no beds out here. There was  _ no one _ out here. He struggled to hold his hand still as terror swept over him, and he started walking. Piles of ash dotted the beach, and his compass kept pointing out to the sea, until it finally started turning. Asra stepped back, and the needle moved back, but there was no one there. He looked down, at the pile of ash at his feet. His stomach cramped horribly as his breath caught in his throat. He dropped the compass and went down on his knees, staring at the ash, and then frantically started digging. Tears streamed down his face as he dug, the sand and ash and bits of charred bone ripping at his skin. Soon he was covered in black soot, his hands dirty and bloody. He cried silently, closing his eyes and lifting his face to the sky.

Someone approached him cautiously, kneeling beside him and putting a hand on his shoulder. "There's nothing you can do for them now," the doctor said, voice muffled by the mask. "You're risking your own life by being here. We can't let you do that. Please come back and go back to the mainland. Please."

Numbly, Asra managed to nod and let the doctor help him stand, and together they walked back up the beach towards the building. Dozens of pairs of eyes settled on him, doctors and patients alike, as the doctor escorted him back out of the building and onto the beach where his boat had landed. "I'm sorry for your loss," the doctor murmured, squeezing his shoulder. And then he left Asra alone. With nothing else to do, Asra pushed the boat back into the water and climbed in.

He wandered through the streets of Vesuvia, unsure as to where exactly he was going. He wasn't surprised when he found himself at the shop; it was locked, but not warded. Asra found his keys and let himself into the dark building, letting the door close behind him. He looked around, gaze empty, until he saw the plague mask on the counter. He reached out and picked it up with trembling hands, staring into its glassy eyes.

Abruptly, Asra hurled it at the wall, the force of his magic behind the throw. It struck the wall and shattered into a dozen pieces, falling to the floor as Asra did as well, sobbing hysterically. His cries tore from his chest as he crossed his arms over it. 

He barely registered it when the door to the shop slammed open. He didn’t look up as he heard Julian breathe, “Asra,” and felt him go down on his knees beside him. Julian’s arms went around him, his hand pressing Asra’s head to his shoulder as he rocked him, letting him cry on him.

When Asra’s sobs had abated, Asra wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “Why are you here?” He asked in a thick, shaking voice.

“Thomas asked me to check on the shop every once in a while, when he was sent to the lazaret. I heard you screaming from down the street.”

Asra chuckled bitterly, pulling away from him. “I came as soon as I got your letter, but it was... it was too late.” He took a shuddering breath, suppressing more tears. His mind, frantic still, went over all of his magical knowledge. To cover for himself, he muttered, “Sorry about the plague mask. I don’t know what came over me.”

Julian looked at the shattered remains of the mask. “It’s alright. We’d have had to destroy it now, anyway. I just... couldn’t bring myself to do it. So I guess I owe you thanks. I’ll go clean it up-“

“No. Stay with me.”

Julian hesitated, then put his arms around Asra again, holding him. They sat like that in silence for several minutes. Finally, Asra had a plan. It was dangerous- it was so, so dangerous- but it would work. It had to work. He couldn’t live without him. “I need to talk to Lucio,” he said in a shaking voice. “I- I want to help. Maybe if I’d stayed, we’d have- we’d have found the cure in time. This was so important to him that he died for it. I have to see it through now. For him.”

Julian’s embrace tightened. “Are you sure? No one would blame you if you left again. Hundreds of people are dying every day now.”

“I’m sure. I shouldn’t have left to begin with. But I have to talk to Lucio.”

“Why? I’m the one who needs to know that you’re willing to help- me and Valdemar, that is.”

“It’s- it’s personal.” He didn’t know if Lucio would help him or not, but he knew that Julian would reject the plan. One didn’t need to be a magician to know that what he was planning was dangerous. Asra wasn’t even sure his soul would still be in tact by the end of this. But he had to try, and Julian would try to stop him.

“... alright. If you say you need to talk to him, I believe you. But there’s something you need to know, first.” He took a deep breath. “Lucio has the plague.”

Asra stilled, despair washing over him. If Lucio was gone... would Nadia help him with this? He was banking on being able to guilt trip Lucio to get his cooperation. He knew Lucio didn’t feel a damn bit of guilt, but maybe he could be made to feel like he owed Asra something. Maybe, maybe not.

But he definitely had no such leverage against Nadia. “How long does he have?”

“That’s, uh, that’s more difficult to say than it should be. He’s had it since around the time you left.”

Asra’s eyes widened. “But I’ve been gone for months,” he protested. And then a thought occurred to him. “Thomas never mentioned this in his letters.”

“That’s not surprising. Lucio demanded we keep it a secret. I think in these circumstances, he’d expect me to tell you- he’ll want to see you. He was so mad at you, Asra. He asked Thomas if he wanted to have you brought back by force. He declined, obviously, but Lucio was tempted to do it anyway.”

Asra closed his eyes, shuddering. If Lucio had brought him back by force, he doubted he’d have had the freedom to do anything. The thought that this might not be a good idea flitted through Asra’s mind and then out of it. No. He had to believe that if Lucio was going to lock him up for leaving, he’d have done it already.

Julian had the same thought, though, and voiced it. “It might be safer for you to leave.”

“No,” Asra said immediately, with a shake of his head. “I ran once and look where it got me. I’m not afraid of him. Especially not if he’s sick with the plague. It saps the victims’ strength. He can’t harm me physically and I have to believe that Nadia won’t let him lock me up.”

“As you wish.” Asra could tell that Julian wasn’t satisfied with how that conversation went, but he didn’t argue further. Instead, Julian helped Asra to his feet. “Do you want to go now?” Asra nodded, and he said, “Go wash your face. It’s obvious you’ve been crying. Weak as he is, you still don’t want to show him weakness.”

Asra nodded and wandered up the stairs to the living space. The bed was still unmade, Thomas’s bedclothes strewn haphazardly across it. Tears threatened to overwhelm him again as he picked up Thomas’s shirt and pressed it to his face, sinking down on the edge of the bed. 

He wasn’t sure how long he was like that before Julian came up the stairs after him. Julian stood in the doorway, watching him for several heartbeats, before approaching and gently pulling the shirt away from Asra’s face. “That’s not a good idea,” he chided quietly. “If you’re going to live here, you might want to burn his clothes and all the bedding, while you’re at it.”

“I can’t.” Asra choked on the idea. 

Julian patted his shoulder. “It was just a suggestion. Come on, upsy-daisy. Let’s get you presentable.”

Julian didn’t leave Asra’s side again, staying by him until he’d washed his face, changed into clean clothes, and drank some water. “Would I be pushing too far if I asked you to eat something?” he asked quietly.

Asra shook his head. “My stomach hurts...”

“I’m sorry. It will for a while. You still need to eat.”

“I know. Just... not now.” He took a deep breath. “Am I presentable enough?”

“You don’t look like you’ve been crying for hours in a fireplace anymore. Let’s go face the music. I’ll stay with you unless he sends me away.”

“No,” Asra said, squaring his shoulders. “I need to face him alone.” 

Julian was quiet. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. Let’s go.”

The pair walked in silence through the streets of Vesuvia. Bodies were piled on the sidewalk in front of dwellings. “I thought we were sending the sick to the lazaret,” Asra murmured.

“The ones we know of, yes. And Lucio hasn’t decreed yet that we can force anyone to go, although he’s quickly getting to that point.”

“I- I see. I hate to say it but I think he better get to that point sooner rather than later. This is so unsanitary... more people are going to get sick from it.”

“We’re doing the best we can, Asra. I can personally guarantee that.”

Asra said nothing more. He believed him, he just didn’t feel that their best was good enough. He wouldn’t say that, though. He could hear in Julian’s voice that he knew it already.

Nadia came to the salon to greet them. She went right to Asra, folding him in a tight, warm embrace. “It is so good to see you again,” she murmured into his shoulder, “although I wish the circumstances were different.”

Asra returned her embrace, sighing, closing his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he murmured.

“Whatever for?” She pulled away, hands on his face. “Listen to me, Asra,” she said firmly. “You did nothing wrong. You did the  _ smart _ thing. No one would blame you if you left again.”

“Lucio-“

“No one worth listening to,” she amended coolly.

“Actually, I want to talk to Lucio. Ilya tells me he’s sick.”

“He’s very sick. I’m not sure it would be wise to-“

“Please, Nadia. I have to.”

“Why?”

“I can’t- I can’t tell you that. It’s personal. I promise I won’t harm him.”

“I know you wouldn’t harm him. You wouldn’t harm a fly. It’s the other way around that I’m worried about.”

Asra managed a soft, small smile. “I’m not afraid of him. He’s been sick for months. Maybe before, I was afraid of him, but he’s too weak to do anything to me now. And I think he’ll want to hear what I have to say.”

“Very well. I haven’t told him you’re back yet, but he was awake, last I checked on him. Want to speak with him now, if he still is?”

“Yes please.”

Nadia looked questioningly at Julian, who shook his head. “No. Asra said the topic he wants to discuss is private.”

Nadia gave Asra a curious look; Asra half-shrugged, half-nodded, and Nadia sighed, motioning for him to follow her.

Lucio’s wing was cool and dim; the scent of medical herbs hung in the stagnant air. Asra felt that he was walking into a death chamber, that it was too late. Lucio was on borrowed time at this point; he had no idea how Lucios had survived  _ months _ with this illness, but he was bound to die any second. Asra felt a pang of frustration. He considered asking Nadia to stay so he could explain his plan to her, as well. Would she help, or would she turn him away?

Only one way to find out.

As they reached Lucio's chambers, Nadia stopped him with a touch on his shoulder. "I will be right there with you," she said firmly. "He can't hurt you in the condition he's in, and if he tries, I will stop him. You are safe."

Asra nodded. He had no doubt that he was safe from Lucio, but it was nice to know that Nadia was on his side. He took a deep breath, and knocked firmly. Lucio's voice, sick and strained, called out, "Enter!" and Asra pushed the door open. 

Lucio's red-eyed gaze fell on him and he sneered. "You're too late," he coughed. "He's gone."

"I know." Asra fought to keep his voice even. "I... I want to help now. Finding a cure to this meant something to him, and I don't want to lose anyone else that I care about."

"How touching." He took a breath that rattled in his lungs. "We weren't comfortable leaving him alone for a week after you left, you know. He never made a move to harm himself but we still had to babysit him, for our own peace of mind. Jules was especially worried about him. That is, until we stopped being able to keep up with the dead and dying. Then Jules focused all of his attention on the cure. He didn't even know Thomas was sick until he needed to be carried to the Lazaret."

Asra forced himself to remain still. So much for Julian caring about Thomas. Not only had Thomas died, he'd died alone. But that wouldn't matter soon. It could be undone. It had to be able to be undone. "I'm sorry," he managed to whisper. "I tried to convince him to come with me. He wouldn't. I couldn't take him against his will."

"Oh, I know. He was as stubborn as you are." Lucio coughed again, violently, bringing a handkerchief to his mouth. Asra's stomach twisted as he saw that the white cloth came away stained red. Lucio smiled sardonically. "And now  _ I'm _ dying. What are you going to do about it, magician?"

Lucio's words took him by surprise. He hadn't even considered that Lucio would want him to help him. This might work out better for him, he thought to himself. There was no need to guilt trip Lucio into helping him if he thought that Asra was helping  _ him _ . It would be risky; if Lucio detected his treachery, his life would be forfeit. 

That was no worse than the situation he was already in. "I was coming to you to offer help, actually," he lied. "Ilya tells me you've been sick for months. That doesn't normally happen. People who contract the red plague generally die in days."

"I'm acutely aware of this," Lucio clipped.

Asra fought back a smile. He was too wrapped up in his situation to notice any double-dealing from Asra. He was sure of it. "What if I told you I could... provide you with a new body? One that isn't infected with the plague?"

Behind him, Nadia gasped. Lucio's gaze fixed on her for a moment before refocusing on Asra. "Impossible," he snapped. "You're powerful, but you're not  _ that _ powerful."

"You're right, I'm not." He paused, giving this one last thought. Did he really have the spine to do this? The thought terrified him, but the thought of living without Thomas for the rest of his life terrified him more. "But the Arcana are."

Interest glimmered in Lucio's eyes. "The Arcana, huh? What makes you think they'll be interested enough to do this for me?"

"Most of them wouldn't be, you're right. But there is one, one who thrives on making deals with mortals. The Devil." The words hung in the air for several seconds as it sank in. "The Devil would gladly grant you a new body. But it will be dangerous- and costly."

"Whatever the cost, I'll pay it." Lucio broke down coughing again. When the fit passed, he rasped, "Tell me what I have to do."

"I'm not sure yet. I have to contact him and find out his terms, which will be... difficult. But I can do it."

"Then do it," Lucio demanded. "Right now."

"That's not how this works. I need to prepare. I'll have an answer for you in three days."

Lucio scowled. "Fine. Three days. And Asra- I'm not taking 'no' for an answer. No matter what the cost, I'm willing to make the deal. Got it?"

"Got it," Asra murmured, his heart pounding. This was so dangerous, and Lucio wasn't even thinking twice. Was it bravery, recklessness, desperation, a combination of all three? Asra wasn't sure what was driving Lucio, but it was all three for him. He had to be honest with the Devil about his duplicity- if the Devil thought he was going to stab  _ him _ in the back, the consequences would be dire. "If we're done, I have preparations to-"

"No, we're not done," Lucio snapped. "You  _ left _ us, Asra. You turned tail and you  _ ran  _ like the coward you are. I don't need to be a magician to know this is dangerous. I didn't drag you back here in chains because Thomas asked me not to, but Thomas isn't here to protect you anymore. Betray me, run from this, and you will never see the light of day again. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal," Asra replied dryly. If only he knew how much Asra had riding on this as well... Satisfied that Asra understood him, Lucio waved a hand dismissively, and Asra turned on his heel and stalked out of the room. 

Nadia followed closely behind him, shutting the door behind her. "You're not a coward," she said in a low voice. "Don't listen to him. You're not the only one who left the city to escape the plague. It was the smart thing to do, not the cowardly thing."

"No, he's right. Thomas was brave enough to stay. I should have been, as well." He took a deep breath. "Can I ask a favor?"

"Anything."

"Take a walk with me."

Nadia nodded, and linked arms with Asra, guiding him down the hall and back out into palace. From there, they headed for the veranda, and then down into the gardens. It was quiet there, and a quick sweep of magic told Asra that there was no one there but them. "There's something I have to tell you."

"I'm listening."

"I don't intend to bargain for a new body for Lucio."

"Ah." She glanced at him, calmly. "What  _ do _ you intend, then?"

"I intend to bargain for a new body for  _ Thomas _ ."

Nadia was quiet, but when she spoke, she didn't sound surprised. "You know he's going to kill you when he realizes that you've betrayed him, and then he'll kill Thomas again out of spite."

"Only if he survives."

At that, Nadia's eyes widened. "You wouldn't kill  _ him _ ," she breathed.

"What? No. But the magic might. He's going to be as much a part of this process as I am- and he's already weak. The process will likely kill him. I'm simply going to do nothing to try to mitigate it."

"You sound awfully sure of what you have to do."

"I have a good idea." He stopped and turned to her, taking her hands in his. "But I need your support, Nadia. If something goes wrong- if he survives- I need you to be there to protect us. Don't tell me you want him to survive. I know you better than that. He makes you miserable."

"But I don't want him dead," she murmured. Then she shook her head, as if clearing it. "But if it's between him and you and Thomas, I would choose you and Thomas. Easily. You have my support, Asra. Just... just be careful, and keep me abreast of what's happening. I cannot help you if I'm kept in the dark."

Asra nodded. Then, as if trying to convince himself, he said, "I... I don't want him dead, either. But I want Thomas back, more than anything. This is so unfair. He was my world, and now he's... just... gone." Tears threatened to overwhelm him, and Nadia pulled him into her arms, letting him bury his face in her shoulder. She stroked his curls, murmuring comforting words. They stayed like that for several minutes before Asra pulled away. “I better go see Ilya,” he said in a thick voice. “He was worried enough about me to stay in the room while I changed into clean clothes.”

“Why did you need to change into clean clothes?”

“I was covered in ash.” He sighed, lifting his hands for her to see. She gasped as she saw how his fingers were torn. “I went to the lazaret, hoping... hoping he was still alive, that I could tell him...” Tears flooded his eyes again. “I never told him how much I love him...”

“Oh, Asra...” She pulled him back into her arms as he dissolved into tears again. “I think he knew,” she whispered. “Anyone could see it in how you cared for him, hear it in your voice when you spoke to him. He knew, Asra. I know he did.”

Asra shook his head, choking back his tears. “I am so sick of crying,” he muttered, pulling away from her. “I got your dress wet. Sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. Come, let us go let Julian know you’re still in one piece.”

* * *

Asra sighed as he locked the shop door. Another night of experiments that produced nothing. The Devil wanted half of his heart to bring Thomas back. It was a price he was willing to pay, but he had time to try to do things his own way. They would attempt to grant Lucio a new body at the Masquerade this year; that would fail, because Asra had already made plans to sabotage the ritual, make it so that the body would go to Thomas.

But if he could bring Thomas back on his own, there would be no need to sacrifice half of his heart, no need to sabotage the ritual. He’d have Thomas back, Lucio would have his new body, and everyone would be happy. 

He knew better than to believe that was what was really going to happen. But still... it would be nice.

He turned in the direction of the palace. He wasn't doing any of his research at the palace, but Lucio wanted him to make appearances, and Ilya seemed to find his presence useful, too. He could do his experiments at night; it was safer that way, anyway. If anyone knew he was dabbling in necromancy now...

"It should've been you."

The sound of her voice stopped him dead in his tracks. He knew that voice. Long fingers of dread skated up his spine, threatened to wrap around his throat and choke him. "Saskia," he greeted, not turning, standing stiffly.

He heard her stalk forward. "It should have been you," she repeated harshly. He could hear tears in her voice. "He was a light in this world, and now it's snuffed out, and  _ you're _ still standing, going about your life as if nothing ever happened!"

"That's not true!" he spat, whirling to face her. He had no idea how she knew of Thomas's demise, but she was here now, and she obviously blamed him. "You know nothing about me," he hissed. "You never bothered to try to get to know me!  _ You abandoned him _ , and left me to pick up the pieces! We were  _ happy _ until this happened, and my life has revolved around fixing it since he died!"

"You can't fix this, Asra! He's dead! It's too late! He's dead and  _ you _ didn't protect him!"

" _ I loved him! _ " Asra screamed at her. "I tried to convince him to leave with me! He refused! What did you expect me to do, tie him up and take him by force?! Don't you think I know that I should've tried harder?!"

Saskia stared at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. She shook her head, silent tears shaking her shoulders. "It should have been you," she repeated.

"It should have," he rasped, "but it wasn't. There's nothing I can do about it now except what I am doing. He-" He thought about telling her his plans but- no. "He stayed because he wanted to help cure the plague. He wanted everyone to be safe. I've picked up where he left off. That's all I can do now, honor his wishes."

Much to his surprise, she smiled through her tears. "You would think that's enough."

"I know it's not enough." He looked away. "I'll have my things out of the shop by tomorrow, since you're back now. I-"

"No," she cut him off softly, "I gave it to him and he left it to you. It's yours." She took a deep breath. "Thank you, Asra. For loving him. Even if I don't think you loved him enough, you made him happy." With that, she turned and walked down the street, away from him. Asra watched her go, rooted to that spot. She was wrong. He had loved Thomas with all of his heart and soul. Losing Thomas had shattered him. He wanted to follow her, to tell her as much- he wanted to tell her that he planned on bringing Thomas back to him. 

But no. Necromancy was frowned upon almost universally, and that was what he was doing. At least, what he was trying to do. He just didn't seem to be powerful enough. Sighing, all of the fight and anger going out of him, he turned and trudged towards the castle. 

* * *


	7. Chapter 7

Months later, Asra sat in the bed next to Thomas's sleeping form. He still wore his Masquerade costume, the mask discarded on the floor. If it could've gone wrong last night, it did. Now Julian was on the run, accused of setting Lucio on fire, and although he didn't know it for certain, he had a bone-deep feeling that something terrible had happened to Nadia.

But Thomas was here. He was alive, and breathing, and  _ warm _ .

If only Asra could get him to wake up! 

The thought that Thomas was unconscious for good had crossed Asra's mind, and he frantically shoved it away. He  _ had to _ wake up. Asra had given up too much, forced others to give up too much, to get him back.

Muriel came by on the third day, as Asra was tending to him with a mixture of honey and water. It wasn't much, but it was the only thing he could think of to get Thomas nutrition and water without choking him. He sustained him with magic, mostly, but magic had its limits; Thomas could and would starve or dehydrate to death if he tried to sustain him entirely with magic. Asra set aside the bowl of honey he was carefully dripping into Thomas's mouth and went downstairs to check the door when he heard the knock. "Muriel," he greeted, surprised.

"I heard," he said softly. "Something killed Lucio. You were there. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Asra said with a hesitant smile. "Come on. I have something to show you."

Muriel gave him a strange look, but followed Asra, closing the door behind him as Asra led him up the stairs. He stopped in the doorway of the bedroom, his eyes going wide. "What have you done, Asra?" he murmured, staring.

Asra took his seat next to Thomas again. "The way he lost his life wasn't fair," Asra answered, brushing his fingers through Thomas's hair. "To either of us. I simply gave him a second chance."

“Has he even woken up?”

Asra winced. “Not yet. But he’s alive. His heart is beating, and he’s breathing. That’s enough for now.”

Muriel shook his head, staring at Thomas. “How?”

“How much do you know of what happened at the Masquerade?”

“Only that Lucio was on fire after the ritual to give him a new body failed.”

“Yes. That was probably because I sabotaged it.” He gave him a tight, guilty smile. “I never intended to let him get a new body for himself. It was always going to be for Thomas.”

Muriel was quiet. “Better Thomas than Lucio,” he admitted. “But this is unnatural, Asra. The dead are supposed to stay that way.”

Asra didn’t lose that unnerving, guilty smile. “And what do you think I can do about it now? Kill him?”

Muriel looked like he hesitated to answer. “You... May have to. If he’s... changed.”

“If he’s a monster now, you mean.” He shook his head. “I have to believe that he’s still him. If something went wrong- if he isn’t Thomas anymore- I’ll- I’ll deal with that. But he hasn’t even opened his eyes yet. I’m not going to condemn him before I’ve given him a chance.”

“Alright. I trust you to have control of the situation. But if you need help...”

“If I need help, I’ll come get you.” 

Muriel nodded, and showed himself out.

Asra kept vigil at their bedside, forgetting more than once that he had to eat and sleep, as well. He was dozing in his chair a few days later when a low moan from the bed roused him. “Thomas?” he whispered, moving to sit on the edge of the bed. Thomas stirred and opened his eyes, and locked on Asra’s. Asra gave a short, elated laugh, reaching for him-

\- and stopped as he looked into Thomas’s hazel eyes. He looked at Asra with such profound terror that Asra drew back. “Thomas? It’s- it’s alright. You’re alright. Everything is-“

Talking to him obviously wasn’t working. Asra reached out for him again, and although it took all of Thomas’s strength, he drew back from Asra, shaking his head. A horrible pressure took root in Asra’s chest, and he reached out with magic, soothing him, soothing, reassuring, and-

Asra nearly threw up at the response. It was disjointed and weak, but very clear: Thomas didn’t know who either of them were.

Asra stood abruptly, reaching out again with his magic, commanding Thomas to sleep. Thomas fought it valiantly, but in seconds, his eyes closed and his form slumped. Asra stood there, watching him for several seconds before turning and fleeing, locking and warding the door behind him. 

Then he ran. He ran through the streets of Vesuvia, to the woods. Hot tears stung his eyes as he fought to control his emotions. He couldn’t lose it. He had come too far to lose it.

“Muriel!” he screamed as he neared the hut. “Muriel! Please, please be home!  _ Muriel! _ ”

Muriel appeared in the doorway of the hut, looking worried. “Asra? What’s-“ He cut off as Asra slammed into him, arms going around him, tears bubbling over. “Did something happen to Thomas?” 

Asra cried into Muriel’s chest for a number of seconds before gathering himself. “He doesn’t know who I am,” he managed to choke out. “Or who he is. And he’s terrified of me, Muriel, after everything I did to get him back, he’s still lost! I still lost him! He’s still gone!”

Muriel awkwardly petted Asra’s hair. “You didn’t lose him,” he said, trying to sound comforting. “You did this. You brought him back. You don’t get to run from that now.”

Muriel’s words shocked his tears to a halt. “I wasn’t- I didn’t want- how am I supposed to do  _ anything  _ for him when he’s so scared of me that he won’t let me near him?”

“You’re going to have to earn his trust again.” Muriel shrugged. 

“Just- just like that? Muriel, he’s terrified! I’ve never seen so much fear in a single person before!”

“All the more reason to do this. You said he doesn’t know who he is, right? You did that to him. He’s got no one else, Asra. It has to be you.”

Asra gulped back a frightened sob, nodding. “You’re right. You’re right, this my mess. I have to clean it up.”

“Yes, you do.” Muriel paused, a thought making him tense. “You didn’t leave him in that state, did you?” 

“Of course not. I put him to sleep before I left. He should sleep through the night now.”

“Good.” Muriel sighed. “I would invite you to stay, but you should be there when he wakes up, and the shop is too small for all three of us."

Asra nodded, putting a hand to his face. "Thanks for talking sense into me, Muriel. I- I wasn't expecting this. This is scary. He wasn't even able to  _ talk _ ."

Muriel was quiet. "You're just going to have to teach him, then."

"Right. I have... I've taught him before. Little things. But I know how he learns. Hopefully that didn't change." He exhaled in a sharp puff of breath. "I better get back to the shop. I don't want to leave him unattended for too long."

"Good idea." Muriel put a hand on Asra's shoulder. "You can do this, Asra. You  _ have  _ to."

Asra nodded again. "I have to. I  _ have _ to." Then he looked up at him. "I'll let you know how things are going. Take care, Muriel."

"Take care."

Asra turned and walked back to the city, his heart and mind in turmoil. He thought he was getting his lover back. He couldn't very well tell Thomas that they were lovers if he knew nothing. Doing so would edge so close to taking advantage of him that Asra didn't want to do that. He wouldn't have been lying- but Thomas wouldn't know that. The thought of rebuilding their relationship from the ground up was a daunting, upsetting one, but he was willing to put the work in to do it. He'd come this far already. He'd see this through to the end. 

Asra didn't sleep well that night; how could he? He still had no idea how he was going to do this. He'd start with the basics, he figured: introducing himself, telling Thomas who he was. He'd take it from there, but those were the first basics that Thomas needed to know. He was still sitting in the chair, still dozing, when Thomas stirred again. Asra watched as Thomas blinked his eyes open. That horrible fear fell immediately over his features, and Asra resisted the urge to reach out to him. "It's okay," he said in a soothing voice. "You're okay. You're safe. I'm not going to hurt you." As Asra spoke, the fear eased, although mistrust remained in his hazel eyes. Asra swallowed back his despair. This was his soulmate, his moon and sun and stars, the love of his life, and he was so scared of him... "I think we may have gotten off on the wrong foot yesterday," Asra said. "You... can you understand me?" Very slightly, Thomas nodded. Asra managed a smile. "Good. My name is Asra. I'm... I'm a friend. Your name is Thomas. You're safe here. I won't let anything happen to you." 

They sat in tense silence for several minutes. Finally, Asra asked, "Are you hungry?"

Thomas wasn't sure how to answer that. He closed his eyes, nodding very slightly again. "What- what do you want to eat?" Thomas's eyes flew open in alarm. He opened his mouth, and nothing but a wordless whine emerged. He tried again, and Asra reached out, putting a gentle hand over his. "That's alright," he said, his heart sinking. He was right. Thomas  _ couldn't _ speak. "I- you- let's start with something easy on your stomach. I can make some broth and soft vegetables, and we'll see how you do with that. Is that okay?" Thomas took a shuddering breath and nodded. Asra stood. "You can make noise, right? How loud can you get?" 

Thomas gave him a weird look, but opened his mouth. Asra could tell he was trying to actually say something, his voice raised. It was loud enough that Asra would be able to hear him call. "That's good," Asra said. "Yell like that if you need me. I'll be back as quickly as I can."

With that, Asra went through the living area to the kitchenette, and set about making them both something to eat. He doubted that Thomas would be able to manage the vegetables, but he was going to try. If he couldn't then Asra would eat them. Twenty minutes later, Asra returned to find Thomas murmuring under his breath. "Practicing?" Asra asked mildly, sitting down next to him. Thomas met his gaze, still mistrustful, but perhaps less so than he'd been before. He handed the bowl to Thomas, keeping his hands under it while Thomas tried and failed to use the spoon. He made a frustrated noise, and Asra pulled the bowl away. "I know you're not going to like this, but I think I better feed you," he said. Thomas made another unhappy noise and Asra said, "I know. You'll regain your strength in no time, but for now, I'll take care of you." 

Resigned, Thomas let him feed him. He didn't make it through the entire bowl before he sank back into exhausted sleep, and Asra watched his still face, his heart aching. He wanted to touch him, to take him in his arms and hold him again, but he didn't want to frighten him. Asra put the bowl aside and leaned over him, ghosting a kiss on his forehead. "I love you," he whispered, and then gathered up the half-eaten soup and carried it to the kitchen. He needed to eat, as well. It wouldn't do for him to end up so hungry he couldn't care for him.

Days passed, and slowly, the mistrust in Thomas's eyes faded. Asra's heart gave a leap one morning when Thomas  _ smiled _ at him when he woke up. He asked almost shyly if he could join him in the bed, and although Thomas was a little hesitant, he nodded. Asra helped him scoot over, and he settled gingerly into the bed next to him, putting his arms around him, and talking, telling him all the things they would do when he was strong enough to walk. The woods were amazingly beautiful, as was the rest of the city. They could go down to the beach and let Thomas splash around in the waves- not too far out, and Asra would be right there, but playing in the ocean was a fun time. Thomas fell asleep, listening to him talk about all the fun they'd have when his strength was back.

The next day, Asra started encouraging Thomas to move around. They started with simply standing, something that was surprisingly difficult. By the end of the week, Thomas could walk across the room, although Asra had to carry him back to bed; but Asra was starting to get worried. Thomas hadn't spoken a word, and barely made any noise at all. He would get used to it if Thomas never spoke again, he supposed- he had to- but the thought wasn't a pleasant one. Muriel came by after Thomas managed to get across the room; he wouldn't come up to see him, insisting that Asra come down to talk to him. "It's entirely possible that he'll never learn to speak again," Muriel mused. "You could teach him hand-language."

"I could, but I'm not fluent in it. I'd have to find someone to teach both of us." Still, that wasn't the worst thing that could happen. Asra mused over it for a moment before saying, "I'm glad you're here, Muriel. I have a favor to ask of you."

"What is it?"

"Consul Valerius came by the other day," he said. "Apparently the Countess has been in a coma since the night of the Masquerade. Nothing they try can wake her. He's summoned several doctors and none of them have been able to do anything for her. He wants me to try magic, but I can't leave Thomas unattended."

"Will Thomas  _ let _ me watch over him?"

"Thomas can't get out of bed without assistance. He'll have no choice." Muriel set him with a disbelieving look, and Asra sighed. "I don't want to leave him with someone who will make him uncomfortable, no, but you're the only person I trust to take care of him, and he's going to be uncomfortable anyway. It took a week for him to get used to  _ me _ and I was with him constantly. Please, Muriel."

Muriel sighed. "I'll do it, but I'm not going to be in the room unless I have to be if he's going to be mistrustful."

"That's..." Asra winced. He didn't know how long he'd be at the palace, and Thomas hadn't been alone while he was awake for  _ any _ stretch of time. "I guess that has to be fine. Thanks, Muriel. I plan on going tomorrow."

"Alright. I'll come back tomorrow. Bye."

"Bye..." Asra watched him go, then trudged back up the stairs. When he got to the bedroom, Thomas was watching him with bright, curious eyes. "That was my friend, Muriel," he explained, sitting on the edge of the bed again. "He wanted to know how you were doing. And I had a favor I needed to ask of him." Thomas made a questioning noise, and Asra answered, "I... need to go to the palace tomorrow. They need a magician. He's going to stay with you while I'm gone." The shift in Thomas's demeanor was instant and extreme. Thomas shook his head wildly, a frantic, keening noise coming from the back of his throat. Asra caught his hands in his,  _ shh _ ing him soothingly. "I will only be gone for a few hours," he told him, "half a day, at the most. And I've known Muriel since we were small children. He won't hurt you. He'd never hurt you."

Much to Asra's dismay, Thomas dissolved into tears, and Asra gathered him up in his arms, rocking him and stroking his hair. He hated that he was doing this to him, but he  _ had _ to try to help Nadia. Maybe if he explained the situation... Thomas had calmed by then, and Asra said quietly, "Listen. The Countess of Vesuvia is in a coma. No one's been able to wake her, and none of their doctors can figure out why she's asleep. They think it's magical. I may be able to help. She's my friend, too. Please bear with it tomorrow, for a few hours. I will be back, I promise you. I will be back. I would never leave you." 

A hiccup answered him, and Asra smiled against Thomas's hair. He brushed it for him every day; Thomas wore it in a ponytail before his death, and it was half-way down his back. If Asra didn't care for it, it would be a tangled mess in days. He hadn't brushed it yet today. "Want me to brush your hair?" he asked. Thomas nodded against him, and Asra maneuvered around him so that Thomas was sitting between his legs, and picked up the brush. Asra talked as he went, encouraging Thomas to respond. Once, the noise Thomas made almost sounded like a word; "Good job!" Asra praised, even though he wasn't sure at all what Thomas had been trying to say. He set the brush aside and then, on a whim, said, "I'm gonna braid it," and set about doing so.

* * *

Muriel was back the next day, and Asra insisted on him coming up and being near Thomas. Thomas's eyes widened in fear as his gaze fell on him, and Muriel looked back at him with a measure of trepidation, as well. "He looks terrified," he observed. 

"You should've seen him when he first woke up," Asra replied dryly. Then he sat on the edge of the bed. Thomas grabbed at him, frantic, and Asra caught his hands. "We talked about this, remember?" Asra said softly. "I'm just going to the palace. You're going to be alright with Muriel. He's not going to hurt you. He's my best friend, and I trust him completely. You can trust him, too."

Even though it tore him up to do it, then, Asra disengaged and stood. "We've already eaten, so you shouldn't need to feed him until I'm back," Asra said, "but if he gets hungry, he can manage bread on his own. I bought some pumpkin loaf this morning; feel free to share it with him. I'll be back as quickly as possible." With that, he turned to head down the stairs.

"A-A-Asra!"

Asra stopped dead in his tracks and whipped around, eyes wide. Thomas was reaching for him, his expression frantic. Asra went back to him, crossing the room in three long strides, sat down on the edge of the bed, and swept Thomas up in his arms. "You said my name!" Asra exclaimed, tears of joy threatening to overwhelm him. Thomas clung to him, whispering the name again, and Asra pulled away. "Can you try another word? Maybe your name?" 

Thomas, flushing, tried. "T-Th-T-T-" 

He made a frustrated noise, and Asra shook his head. "No, it's okay. It's enough. You're getting there. I'm so proud of you." He embraced him again, unable to keep himself from gently pressing his lips to Thomas's cheek. "We'll practice more- when I get back. I really,  _ really  _ need to do this, Thomas. I'm coming back. I promise."

Thomas shook his head, clinging to him. "S-Sl-Sle-"

Asra took a guess as to what he wanted. "You want me to help you sleep?" Thomas nodded, and Asra considered it. He didn't like spelling Thomas to sleep, but if it made their separation easier on him... "Alright. Lie back." Thomas obeyed him, and Asra stretched his magic out over him like a blanket. In seconds, Thomas's eyes fluttered shut, and his breathing evened out. Asra's shoulders slumped. "He's going to have to learn that he can't sleep through everything that makes him uncomfortable," he sighed, "but this is for the best. He should sleep until I get back."

"This really is for the best," Muriel replied, gingerly taking the seat next to the bed. "Hurry back. I don't want to have to try to calm him if he wakes up while you're gone. I don't think I'll be able to."

"I don't think you'll be able to, either. Thanks for watching him for me, Muriel."

Muriel nodded, and Asra headed down the stairs and out the door.

* * *

His attempts to wake Nadia all fell flat. He returned a few times, all with the same results: Nadia slept on, and Asra was exhausted. 

Eventually, Asra stopped going. He thought that Thomas would need him less as he regained his strength, but the opposite happened. Asra quickly realized that all of Thomas’s knowledge, worldly and arcane, had been lost with his memory. It wasn’t until Thomas tried to grab a pan that had been on their lit stove that Asra truly appreciated just how dire Thomas’s situation was.

Asra had held him close after snatching Thomas’s hand away from the hot stove, trembling. Thomas asked him a few times what was wrong, what had Thomas done wrong, before Asra could answer, disbelief in his voice. “That pan is hot, Tommy. If you had touched it, it would have burned you, very badly.”

“... oh. I- I guess that makes sense...”

Asra sighed, pulling away from him. “And dinner’s probably burned now, too.” A mischievous glint came to Asra’s eyes. “How are you feeling? Want to go out for dinner? I know of this nice pub that makes delicious appetizers- and my favorite food, too.”

“What’s your favorite food?”

Asra ignored the swift pain in his heart. “Blue-tongued skink. It’s delicious. You should try it.” He smiled. “Well? Are you up to going out?”

Thomas nodded, casting a remorseful glance at the ruined dinner. “Sorry I ruined our dinner.”

“You’re not the one who lost his head. You did nothing wrong. Salamander, can you put out the fire?” A moment later, the fire winked out, and Asra grabbed their cloaks from the pegs on the wall. “Let’s go.”

That had been three nights ago; they were now sitting in their bedroom, reading together. Asra and Thomas took turns reading; it was slower for Thomas, but he was learning with remarkable speed. As Asra turned the page, Thomas interrupted him. “Asra?”

“Yes?”

“Who- Who am I?”

Asra gave him a bemused look. “You're Thomas.”

“Yes, I know, but- but who was I before- before?” 

Asra was still for a moment, before picking up the bookmark, setting it in the book, and setting it aside. “You’re sure you want to know?” he asked quietly. 

Thomas nodded firmly. “I’m sure. Tell me.”

Asra thought for a moment. “Your name  _ is _ Thomas, although for all the years we’ve known each other, I never knew your last name. You came from a home life that wasn’t the greatest and you didn’t talk about your childhood much, but you had an aunt who loved you like you were her own son.” Asra’s eyes lost focus as he talked, losing himself to the memories he was speaking. “You were the most brilliant magician I’d ever met- and you still are, even needing to start from square one. And-“ He took a deep breath, his gaze fixing on Thomas’s face again. “We were lovers.”

Thomas sounded breathless, pained. “We were- you and I were- were lovers?”

“Yes.” Asra reached out and touched Thomas’s face, gently caressing his cheek and leaning in close. “I love you so much, Thomas. I...” Thomas stared at him, wide-eyed, and Asra leaned forward, pressing his lips to Thomas's gently. Thomas kissed back, but the motion was stiff, and Thomas's breath hitched in his throat. A low, pained noise emerged from Thomas's throat, and Asra pulled away abruptly, alarmed. "Thomas?" He watched as Thomas's hands went to his head and he bowed it, pain etched on his face. "Thomas? Thomas! What's- what's wrong?!"

Thomas shook his head, the pained noise growing in volume and pitch until he was screaming. Asra's magic leapt to his hands and he laid them on Thomas's head, searching for the source of the pain. Before he could really search, though, Thomas fell forward, and Asra grabbed him to keep him from falling off the bed. "Thomas!" he cried. " _ Thomas! _ " He shook him, but Thomas didn't respond. Carefully, Asra laid him back on the pillows; Thomas stared straight ahead, eyes unseeing. He frantically felt for Thomas's pulse, and found it strong, if too rapid. Asra stretched his magic over Thomas frantically, searching desperately for the problem. He couldn't find anything. There was no reason for Thomas to lose consciousness like this! What had happened?

Asra stood and started pacing, staring at Thomas's still form. He was still breathing. He was still alive. He didn't know how long he had to figure this out before he  _ wasn't _ alive anymore. Fear tore at him, clouding his mind, and he shook it, as if to clear it. He had to think! Thomas had been fine before telling him about his past, about who he was. Was that what sparked this? Biting his lip, Asra sat on the edge of the bed again, once more summoning his magic to his hands. He could take memories, he knew; it was a tricky process, but he'd done it a few times when he was a child, and got caught stealing food. It was easy enough to avoid the consequences to his actions when he could just take away the memory of the theft.

But it had been a long, long time since he'd had to do that. Did he remember how to do it?

Slowly, painfully slowly, he felt his magic permeate the wall in Thomas's consciousness, rendering him catatonic. As he wiped the memory of that conversation from Thomas's mind, the wall came down, brick by brick, until Thomas's eyes slid shut, his heart slowed, and he breathed easier. The pain in his face smoothed away, and Asra brushed Thomas's bangs back from his forehead, watching in relief as he slept, his mind in turmoil. Something about that conversation had triggered that episode, and Asra had no idea what. His blood ran cold as he realized that it happened right after Asra told him that he loved him, right after he'd kissed him.

He couldn't tell him that he loved him. Thomas had died not knowing it, and now Asra couldn't tell him. 

Asra sank to his knees at the side of the bed, burying his face in his arms, and cried.


End file.
